Thursday, September 28, 2006

I am not supposed to make fun of white people


Ahh sorry for the delay in updating for your drunk asses with the mp3s and rants you come to drunk and focused looking for. I had an excuse I was locked in my room doing remixes with evaredy and getting mixes to give away to your asses and writing my monthly column which I had to be edited cause it was too insensitve to rich white kids. I wish I was kidding. Apparently saying that Beer and Rap's Hard As Fuck mix is the perfect soundtrack to go around listening to when you want to punch a frat kid drinking coors light in the face is not proper, or saying shit about freshmen girls putting on 15 pounds in their ass is crude, funny, but crude.

Anyway here is the column out as of yesterday
On the Ones and Twos

More B-More

A Monthly Column by DJ Beat Pervert

As summer ends and fall creeps up on us with an onslaught of tourists to trainspot the foliage when it most resembles the colors that swirled inside of Syd Barret’s head, we leave our descent into guitars, bottles of Mad Dog filled with acid, and that dirty old man of the mountain and return to the world that is bass music, a world which is bringing sexy back in the form of one tip drill at a time.


We mentioned Tittsworth before in this here column, and we have to mention him again because dude has taken over the Baltimore Club scene like he was Marlow from HBO’s “The Wire.” Tittsworth has just released his fourth vinyl release of the year, all the while dropping more gems than a bedazzler in the hands of a pushy stage mom who just dabbled in her kid’s Adderall bottle. For this release he joined up with NY’s Dj Ayres, whose known as one of the three djs behind what has been known to be one of the best parties in Brooklyn, The Rub, with his fellow dj’s Cosmo Baker and Dj Eleven. These two partner up an assault on the B-more club sound that would make the classic wrestling tag-team the Rock n Roll Express proud. Their aptly named label, T&A records, first release features a viscously smooth reworking by Tittsworth of the Four Tops “You Keep Running Away.” Tittsworth then changes from that bump smooth Motown shit to some of that harder dance floor mayhem with an excellent remix of Pitbull’s “Bojangles.” A track that is guaranteed to turn any party into the “most baller shit ever,” I am talking the party that Kid 'n' Play envisioned when they pitched ideas to the studios about “House Party 5: Project Pat is Out of Prison and Coming to Visit.”

Now, Tittsworth isn't the only one making Baltimore noise these days. Unruly Records is back up to the limelight with a ridiculously good release featuring three tracks from King Tut and the B-more club kingpin himself, Scottie B, who are joined on the release by Hollertronix’s Low Budget. Low Budget last shined on the Gutta Music ep where he reworked the “Curb Your Enthusiasm” theme song into a track that can only be described as what Larry David would refer to as “pretty, pretty, pretty good.” With this release he proves he is indeed on Unruly’s level and that now he is just not a dj, but also producer to be on the look out for. Low Budget is staying busy as well by teasing the masses with his Trilledlephian’s project with Dirty South Joe that is keeping Philly on the map harder than Ryan Howard’s home run swing, and has kids worldwide now doing the “Wu Tang,” the dance that is.

Now if B-more club is about two things, “pussy or fighting records,” as Scottie B would assert, than Beer and Rap’s mix series is all about the latter as Serg, the mastermind behind beerandrap.com, brings together the best fighting records in rap music there is for his “Hard as Fuck” mixtape series. For volume 2 he enlists the criminally underrated Dj B-Cause to take over the mixing duties. B-Cause is known for Slump and Grind mixtapes with a Ross Hogg which showcased their skills in two well crafted mixes exposing the world to the dope music being concocted in the Bay Area of California. As usual B-Cause does not disappoint in this mix bringing the hardest beats, and rhymes together as smoothly as the tooth fairy creeping into your bedroom to snatch your tooth and leave you a shiny quarter. Also as an added bonus listening to this mix will increase your desire to drink a lot of beer, and reenact a fight scene from the Patrick Swayze juggernaut of classic film “Roadhouse” . Any mix with this effect gets the Beat Pervert’s drunk and focused seal of approval.

So as the kids go back to school, hay rides become haunted, apple cider gets mixed with whiskey and kids fantasize of creating the ultimate Balky from “Perfect Strangers” halloween costume. We can sit back and enjoy the falls offering of beautiful music with the wholesome message of either fucking or fighting, and yes we too appreciate the simple things in life

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