Drunk and Focused

You Know I Really Should Have Been the MVP This Year

2009-05-07T10:13:00.000-07:00

I need to get this off my chest because its been bugging me since it's been announced but how the hell did I not win the MVP this year? This is a travesty, and to add insult to injury I didn't even receive one vote. You know who also didn't receive one vote? Yep, that Gump Ass Garnett. Now are the reporters trying to say I am on the same level as Kevin Garnett? Me, Matt Bonner, the White Bill Laimbeer, the red rocket with a stroke so sweet Ray Allen asks me for shooting tips, and not to mention arguably the toughest NBA player in history. And these reporters have the audacity to say Garnett is on my level. Why don't you just put a battery acid on my nuts while you're at because that's basically what your doing by implying this Garnett is on my level nonsense. Garnett is old, washed up, and no where near as cool as I am. Hell, I even have video proof of this.

Yep just another one of the billion upon billion Bonner-maniacs

You think people make Youtube videos of Kevin Garnett proclaiming him the coolest Celtic? Heck no becausewe all know the coolest Celtic is Brian Scalibrine.

Look at Scal give it to the media. This is why I keep telling Pop and his beard to bring him to San Antonio in via trade so we can start the best duo in the NBA called the Ginger Express of Doom. Think the Midnight Express crossed with the Road Warriors, but more high flying and powerful.

But back to the topic at hand and why I should be MVP and here are five reasons that prove my case without a doubt

1. I am Matt Bonner
Reasons 2 through 5 look above. I am Matt Fucking Bonner.

What more reasons could you need? So Lebron enjoy your tainted MVP reign this year cause whatcha gonna do brother next season when Matt Bonner and the billions of Bonner-maniacs come crashing down on you.

And here is a rap track that sums up my mvp year
Brand Nubian - Punks Jump up to Get Beatdown

old house monday

2009-04-27T11:49:00.000-07:00

This is actually more disco than house but it's dope. It's D Train's 1982 track "Keep On." I wanted to drop this track because I just watched Notorious last night and this is one of the sample used in Biggie's "Sky is The Limit."

dope video directed by Spike Jonez to boot

Plus this is a good track to get older black ladies going crazy at the club and not to mention the french. The french love d train.

don't want to be disturbed...

2009-04-24T09:06:00.001-07:00

swishas and erb ft. sleepy brown

Bonner Advice: Playoff Steez

2009-04-22T11:47:00.000-07:00

We no longer jack for advice because they local drunk and focused faithful came through with their own advice questions for NBA superstar Matt Bonner. And yes these are all real questions sent to Matt Bonner.

Dear Bonner, A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I have never seen a man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they can be Lebanese? signed, A concerned neighbor
Dear concerned....errr Miss California,

First things first you'se a meddlesome bitch. Let me guess you spend all day in your house coat, its probaly got a flower design or some shit, listening to R Kelly's "I Believe I can fly" on loop, while staring out your peephole to see what your neighbors are up to. I am saying somebody is trapped in the closest and it might not just be your social working, gym class teaching, must be scissoring it out neighbors. So basically you almost a big an idiot as that wench from California. Advice Edit :Ooops perv told me to read the message again and turns out she wants to know if they are Lebanese. How the fuck am I supposed to know if they are Lebanese? This is the worst mailbag ever who the hell reads this site. I am in the NBA I don't need this shit. You don't see Tim Duncan doing this. I need a new agent.

Dear Bonner, What can I do about all the sex, nudity, fowl language, and violence on my DVR?

Ummmm, two options: A: Stop being a pussy B: Don't dvr that shit.

Who the hell reads this site? Did b2 the baptist's brief stint writing here bring out all the idiots of the Flock? I am embarassed for these questions. Serial I am quitting. THis next question better not suck.

Dear Bonner, I have a man I can't trust. He cheat's so much I am not even sure the baby I am carrying is his.
Just call Maury already and lets watch your man do the dance

Yep, these are the Bonner-maniacs

songs that sound good at 5 AM

2009-04-16T05:09:00.000-07:00

LCD soundsystem - No Love Lost (joy division cover)

RAP RAP RAP RAP RaP par umm RAP

2009-04-08T23:09:00.000-07:00

I googled Rap to see what images came up and lo and behold this cartoon above was one of the top results and I have only one question what the fuck? This is like a High Times Family Circus. Where's the punchline? Is this a covert Jesus ad? Why is the stoner wearing a t-shirt that says rap? Is it ironic or is the illustrator trying to tell us this Andy Samberg looking motherfuckiing loves rap music?

I am confused. Poseidon look at me!

ummm Rap music?
Gang Starr - I'm the Man
and next is one of my personal favorite Gang Starr songs probably because this 12" never left my record bag (well before serato that is)
Gang Starr - Mass Appeal

Your ADD is sCREAMING

2009-04-08T05:36:00.001-07:00

A demo version of a new track from one of my favorite musicians and all around dudes Andy
Eat Cloud - Your ADD is Screaming(demo version)

wait a minute Manu is not from Italy?

2009-04-08T04:39:00.000-07:00

I am sure y'all heard Manu is out for the season after flopping errr messing up his ankle. Don't worry Bonnermaniacs that just means more three pointers for the red rocket to take and make as the Spurs take out Black Mamba and the rest of the west. So I was going to dedicate this kid cudi versus crookers via rusko remix of day n nite to Manu because he was one of them Italians and then beat perv informed me dude was from Argentina. What the hell no wonder he never seemed that enthusiastic whenever I invited him over for some spagett and meat balls.
Kid Cudi versus Crookers - Day n Nite (Rusko Remix)(Bonner jacked this track from a dope blog You Can Call Me Pelski which I accidently found when I was looking for red sox legend Jonny Pesky's site. Yes I was drunk while searching.)
Shout out to the Pesky Pole!

this song sounds good at 4:55 in the AM

2009-04-08T03:50:00.000-07:00

Depeche Mode - Get the Balance Right

the whole gang's back

2009-04-02T17:59:00.000-07:00

Dude so I get a call from perv last night being like blah blah blah drunk and focused, blah blah you sold out, blah blah blah send more groupies my way, ehh fuck that dude. But he did send me the complete set of Ernest movies on Blue Ray so I am back at Drunk and Focused wondering what went wrong in my life.
So y'all probably want some advice cause Bonner so smart, so rich, and get so many ho's ( and I don't even take them out for dinner I give them a few bucks and tell that ho she can go grocery shopping). So here it is the return of jacking your advice

Dear Amy: I've been married to my husband for 16 years, and we have two beautiful children. He has always been a good provider and father.

Five years ago we purchased a computer for the children to use for school.

My husband has been using the computer for his recreational use. He plays a lot of online poker for fun and looks at porn.

I have told him of my concern and dismay at his porn viewing. He told me not to worry because he would never go to a chat room or try to hook up with anyone. Lately I've found some nasty messages from women on a sex 24/7 Web cam site in our spam in-box. This wouldn't concern me, but the messages said these women have seen his contact information and are inviting him to their sites.

Some of the messages said, "I only live six miles from you; contact me, and maybe we can hook up." I have always trusted my husband, but this has really shaken me up. Do you call this emotional infidelity? Am I making something out of nothing? I'm not sure if I should talk to him about this. I dearly love my husband and treasure our life and the family we've made together. I'm tempted to cancel our Internet connection, but that would also prevent our children from doing their research for school. I don't want this to ruin us. —Heartsick

Dear Heartsick: It doesn't sound as if you are making something out of nothing—it sounds as if you are making too little out of something. Emotional infidelity is when a person becomes emotionally involved with someone else while excluding his or her partner. From what you say, it doesn't sound as if your husband is involved with these women (the messages in your in-box might be uninvited spam brought on by his porn habit). Even after the issue of emotional infidelity is dealt with, there is still the question of his choice to bring porn into your home. If your husband is visiting sites with Web cams and if you have a Web cam at home, your children could be lured into using it. This is a worst-case scenario, but a possibility. Carefully monitor this situation. If you and he have a good relationship and a treasured life together, then you should do everything you can to work this out with him so you feel respected, your children are safe and your husband's recreational needs are met in a way that doesn't affect others in the

household.

Now here is the real Bonner talk. Your husband likes to wait till you are asleep and have cam sex with random females. He also probably has a lot of pics of his dick he sends out, and if he has any nudies of you probably sends those around, and could possible be even freaky enough to pretend he's you and talk to lesbians and or other dudes, like that guy that went to prison for pretending to be his ex wife and sending dudes naked pics of her. What I can tell you girl the internet is a sick place. My only advice start a cam whore business and lure him to your site, then yell GOTCHA. A healthy marriage hinges on you being able to catch him with his dick out.

RECENT DIVORCEE IS UNHINGED BY MEN'S ROMANTIC REJECTION

DEAR ABBY: I am a 30-year-old, attractive, recently divorced attorney and single mother. My problem is I become extremely threatened when I'm romantically rejected, and I need to know how to gain a healthier approach to rejection.

I have dated occasionally, but nothing has developed into anything serious because I have yet to find someone with whom I feel completely compatible. However, when I start dating someone and he doesn't feel the same, it negatively affects my self-esteem. I feel and act depressed, and then I begin feeling insecure, anxious and irrational.

I recently drove someone away because when he didn't call me one night, I went wild with anger and anxiety. I realize this heightened response is not normal. It is also quite painful. Frankly, the intensity of my feelings frightened me, and I'm at a loss about how to handle it.

How can I get over feeling so insecure in relationships so rejection won't damage and disrupt my sense of self? -- DISCOMBOBULATED IN BROOKLYN

DEAR DISCOMBOBULATED: May I remind you that the process of dating is like sifting for gold for everyone involved. It can take a lot of effort and sifting before you finally strike the mother lode. When it comes to dating, I know of few things that are more of a turn-off than a woman -- or a man -- who has the word "needy" stamped on her (or his) forehead.

If you felt good about yourself, you would not be so dependent upon these men for validation. Your intense, angry and anxious reactions when a man doesn't call may be related to your divorce -- or they may stem from earlier insecurities you brought into your marriage. Unless you develop confidence about your self-worth, your relationships with men won't change.

Please give this some thought -- and if you agree that I'm on the right track, consider consulting a psychologist who can help you develop some tools for emotional independence. Once you have achieved it, your odds of meeting "Mr. Right" will be much better.

Yo I know this girl, and stop calling Bonner. I told you Brooklyn goes hard and sometimes so does Bonner. Also its not cute to talk about law while giving head, in fact its kind of awkward, garble, garble, amendment 26 and hell I can't understand what you're saying. Guys don't like that. But listen baby some crazy dude out for money will love you for all your worth. In the meantime how about you start calling Christian Laettner. He loves your type, and he is tall. If he fails there is always Cherokee Parks, or a VHI reality show.

Back In the Day

2009-04-02T15:53:00.000-07:00

I used to love this Ahmad song back in the day when I got free radio promos from my brother, girls wore biker shorts, and the only thing I had to worry about was homework. But I am older now and I still like girls in biker shorts, ideally gyrating to this song
dj fatman - back in the day

mile high and gone????

2009-04-02T13:14:00.002-07:00

Yo I know what the fuck is going on? The loyal drunk and focused readers have been irate. Where is perv? Why is Bonner just concentrating on basketball and not love advice. Why is Evaredy just worried about running NH in Perv's absence(side note I still run NH) instead of posting soul and rap tracks. WHy the fuck hasn't drunk and focused been updated in months. Well your boy perv has a lame excuse I moved out to Denver for a few month bid to write one of them books. Them redheads I don't know? I think they went out on strike or some shit. Anyway the god has returned and drunk and focused is back, and be on the lookout for the new Freakout mix which is done and will be dropping in the next few days. Think pysch/kraut rock, scissor test bands, good ol fashioned rap music, and that sabbath metal. Ummm I kill it, and its worth the wait.

So what have I been up you wondering? Well I look at mountains, write, hang out with my niece, be fly, wear designer suits, and fist fight walrus and coyotes. You know the deal. Plus I listen to a lot of rap music. So here is a rap post.

First up is EPMD and that famous loop that makes damn near any rapper sound good
epmd - it'a my thing
Next is Mad Lion rapping over the same loop
mAD lion - body and shape
Next is Jay Z not rapping over that same loop. Yep a drunk and focused curve ball and instead of ain't no nuh, we get "It's Allright" one one of my favorite Jay Z song and what up talking heads!
Jay Z - It's Allright
Last is some jungle brothers for those belly dancing girls out here who love them west coast syths and a diva shout out to Jay Cutler
Jungle Brothers - Belly Dancing Diva

And oh yeah fuck Jay Cutler and his lesbian hair wearing diva ass. You ain't John Elway, ya heard. Let me repeat you ain't John Elway.

Clean With It

2009-04-02T13:14:00.001-07:00

Young Dro - Clean With It

Dear Bonner: Jacking your Advice

2009-01-22T10:54:00.000-08:00

Bonner Is back with some actual good advice. I am going to stop jacking advice one day but all I get now from emails from the drunk and focused faithful is fan letters on some groupie love shit( sorry gals, and that one dude named E something I am a married man) and of course people just commenting on how tough I am. Yes we all know Matt Bonner is a tough dude. If I was a video game I would be one of them bad dudes but a more extreme tougher version. But you the mail is flattering but it still makes a need for me to jack your shit Abby. So here I am with the biggest column on drunk and focused and the internet as a whole. Tim Duncan sent me a thank you note for this column. So with Tim on my mind and advice on my heart here we get to jacking.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 16-year-old girl, and I'm pretty popular in my high school. I'm blessed to have several close friends, and we always have a great time together. My grades are good, and I get along well with my mom, dad and little brother. So what's the problem, you're probably wondering.

I had an argument with my girlfriend "Amber" recently. It was over a "guy issue." I won't go into details because we did end up working it out, but Amber said something during the blowup that has me worried. She said that sometimes my anger gets out of control and concerns her. Two other girls who were with us at the time agreed with her. That floored me.

Abby, this is the first time I've heard about this. I mean, Mom sometimes calls me "Tammy Temper" -- and has accused me of "throwing fits." But my friends never called me on it. In the fight with Amber, she said my fists were clenched and she was afraid I might hit her. (I didn't think so.)

I don't want to scare people. I value my friends. I look forward to going to college and making new friends and having new experiences. I don't want to have a reputation as a hothead. Can you help me? -- "TAMMY TEMPER" IN HARRISBURG, PA.

DEAR "TAMMY": Anger is a normal human emotion. Everyone experiences anger at one time or another. When primitive humans encountered a threat, they would react instinctively with either fear or anger, which gave them a jolt of adrenaline enabling them to fight or escape. It was a survival mechanism.

Infants show frustration by beating their heads against the side of their cribs, screaming or holding their breath until they turn red. Young children throw tantrums, yelling, kicking or hitting. But as we grow older, we learn to recognize what is upsetting us BEFORE we react, and learn to handle the emotion in acceptable ways.

My booklet "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It" contains techniques for handling anger effectively and constructively. It can be ordered by sending your name and mailing address, plus a check or money order for $6 (U.S. funds) to Dear Abby -- Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. Shipping and handling are included in this price.

Anger is an important subject. While many people have been taught from early childhood to suppress it, it is also important to learn how to express it appropriately. Admitting our anger verbally is one way. It's like releasing steam from a pressure cooker, which is both appropriate and healthy. Mature adults express emotions without "throwing fits" or making bullying gestures. Because your mother calls you "Tammy Temper" and your friends are voicing concern, the time has come for you to take control.

Abby you ignant slut how the fuck you can to use this column to promote your wack ass book. Even giving all the info out to hawk your tired ass drivel from stupid ass book about the anger inside us all. Now what makes me angry Abby is that ain't even your real name. Hell I like my name so much I use it often in the third person to refer to myself, and I don't hide behind some bitch ass fake aristocratic, maybe some rich guy will be fooled and marry me horseshit like Abigail Buchanon. Yo "Tranny Temper" just channel that anger and just beat a bitches ass once and awhile. You are popular and people will now fear and respect you too once you give some unsuspecting victim a savage beatdown. Hell I once beat up a teacher in junior high for failing to give me proper respect by not calling me sir. Some people don't learn unless you use violence. And that goes for you Gump Ass Garnett. Next time I am going to go all Tranny Temper on your ass.

DEAR ABBY: When saying the Pledge of Allegiance, should you put your left hand at your side or behind your back? -- WONDERING IN NEW YORK

DEAR WONDERING: I was taught that your left hand should be at your side.

Yo as usual Abby is wrong, and ideally you put that shit on the ass of a hot a cheerleader thats been giving you eyes all during warm-ups. Thats what Bonner does and keeps my shooting hand warm for making it rain all night.

DEAR ABBY: After many years of being single, I met a woman I'll call "Trish" on a blind date. We're both in our late 40s, and we hit it off. We have many things in common.

One night I was at her place when she received a phone call. Trish made it short and sweet and hung up. A few minutes later, I asked who it was, and she told me it was her boss. Abby, I know how she answers the phone when it's her boss -- and it wasn't him. When I said, "That was NOT your boss," she admitted it was one of her boss's clients, but said nothing was going on between them.

When I first met Trish, she mentioned that a client had come in one day, had wine and cheese, then leaned over and kissed her. It's the same guy that called -- and he's married.

I am very hurt. We have both been cheated on. I don't think she has cheated, but she lied to my face. My first instinct is to dump her, but I love her. What should I do? -- HURT IN VERMONT

DEAR HURT: Are you and Trish in a committed relationship? If not, you had no right to question her about who was calling.

That said, a person who would lie to you once would lie to you twice. Listen to your gut. She may not be having a physical affair, but something is going on or she wouldn't have tried to mislead you about who was on the phone.

Yo Hurt get yo girl in check. Dude stop being a bitch. This girl is playing you. She is going to fuck this client, get hurt, and then crawl back to you. And you know why because you are going to let it happen if you take old battle axe abby's advice. My advice get rid of this girl. Because you better be ready big boy this girl probably has a big posse.

Attack of the redheads....

2009-01-21T08:11:00.000-08:00

Matt Bonner is back.......and so am I. Bonner has got advice, I got tracks with pics.....

Remind Me - Patrice Rushen

Grand Groove (Bonus Mix)

can you feel it old house obama and martin edition

2009-01-20T12:23:00.000-08:00

This was supposed to go up yesterday but for some reason the post forgot to save, but in this new era of hope I decided yes we can do an old house post on a tuesday. Not only is it a new day but we might have the coolest president in our history and one who can ball. I am sure Martin would be proud.
Mr Fingers - Can You Feel It (martin Luther king remix)
This might be one of the greatest house songs ever made and with the MLK speech over it, this just goes to a whole new level.

Next up is Robert Owens who might be the biggest male singer in house music, and one of my favorites. This track is produced by Larry Heard(Mr. Fingers) and some essential deep house. And seems really a fitting song for today. Owens was in Fingers INC before they disbanded and Heard went on to big solo success with his Mr. Fingers name.
Robert Owens - Bring the Walls Down

The last track up is from Black Riot (one of Todd Terry's many alias). This track has some of those famous snyth lines everyone has used and as usual Todd Terry flips them and kills this beat. Dude is the truth. Plus it seems to be a fitting song for change. I don't know just listen to it you won't be disappointed.
Black Riot - A Day in the Life

yo perv you gonna rock recess

2009-01-16T15:42:00.001-08:00

YES You Vetenarian

Dear Bonner: The art of jacking your advice

2009-01-14T10:08:00.000-08:00

Honestly who gives better advice than Matt Bonner? Obviously no one. I am rich, an NBA superstar, and graduated Florida with practically a 4.0( beat perv edit it was 3.96). So if anyone should be giving advice it should be me and not that old bag of bones Erica kane looking saddle horse Abby or any of her clones who are so old and clueless they give advice only found in a Gil Thorpe cartoon. Speaking of shitty ass cartoons fuck Blondie. That shit is so white it makes my skin crawl. Dude marries a bimbo, eats all the time, and has a shitty boss but dude is happy as fuck. How much money can that dude be making to marry Blondie, and why is she with such a tool. Shit does not make sense. Plus he disses rap music. Dude who writes that you write blondie a smug ass cartoon set in the 1950's with no mention of anything in the real world today. You need to go fuck yourself. And fuck Blondie girl is a ho, and why the fuck she running a catering service anyway. Bitch can't cook and she has fake titties. At least in better or worse people aged. And I don't even want to talk about that sally ass son. Who wears their hair like that in 2009?

DEAR ABBY: I am a female who is "over 21." I have always been a tomboy. I love to wrestle with my 200-pound boyfriend. Our struggles are vigorous, but never violent, and always end with a kiss or more. My friends are horrified. They say I could be injured and that any man who would physically "fight" a woman is a potential wife-beater or worse. So many people have warned me to "watch out" that now I'm beginning to wonder. To me, it's a good way to have fun and burn off calories. What's your take on this, Abby? -- LOVES TO TUSSLE IN GEORGIA DEAR LOVES TO TUSSLE: If you are the one initiating these "fights," then I doubt that your boyfriend is a potential wife-beater or worse. (If it were the other way around, I might be concerned.) What you have described sounds more like foreplay than abuse. As long as you both enjoy it and no one becomes injured, what the two of you do is nobody's business, so keep it private.

Yo loves to tussle its Bonner here. First tell them meddlesome bitches to shit the fuck up. If you need to get your hulk hogan on to fuck your husband ain't no shame in that. I am guessing you a big girl right? You can take a piledriver or body slam. Bonner knows your type. But yeah if your man ain't giving it you right maybe I can put you in a sharp shooter, superkick you in the chin and then pin you. I'll have you screaming 1 2 3 all night. That sound good girl? Remember Bonner here for you all night. If you man won't put you in a boston crab I will.

DEAR ABBY: I recently married a man my family and friends, and I, all thought was the perfect man/husband for me -- or anyone, for that matter. We have been married less than two months, and I have undeniable proof that he is married to another woman in another state. We received gifts from two showers -- one given by some friends and another given by my co-workers. Should I give them back? I want to do the right thing. There are about 20 gifts and a small gift certificate. So far, people who know my situation say I should keep them, but are they just being polite? -- EMBARRASSED AND HEARTBROKEN IN NORTH CAROLINA DEAR EMBARRASSED AND HEARTBROKEN: If they have not been used, the gifts should be offered to the people who gave them to you. However, if you have already done this and were told you should keep them, then that's what you should do. The gifts are yours to keep or dispose of as you wish, if you would prefer not to have hurtful reminders around.

Nah fuck that keep those gifts girl, or better yet send them to me, Matt Bonner, NBA Superstar. You get a nice toaster, shit I need a nice toaster. How about a deep fryer, you know Bonner likes to deep fry shit. Yo I am hoping you got a fondue set up just in case Tony Parker and that bitch of a wife of his, who keep asking to come over for dinner one night to hang out with the Bonner man, and who I am running out of excuses of why they can't have them over will finally be able to come over. I figure maybe now I set up a nice fondue night for them, you know everyone loves fondue, even the french and their wives. I think its a french word too, fondue, that sounds about right? But yeah girl how about you bring over those gifts and I make you forget about your man. That sound aight with you?

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married 54 years. She is now 90 and I am 87, although we could both pass for 70. We have made love about once a week since the day we were married -- yes, about 2,800 times. Is there any correlation between frequency of sex and lack of apparent aging? -- FEELS LIKE A KID IN ARIZONA DEAR KID: From everything I have read, regular cardiovascular exercise, lack of stress and a happy marriage contribute to a couple's health and well-being. Because a healthy sex life falls into all three categories, I think you're onto something.

Yo I just puked in my mouth. That shit is some serial gross. Dude I am not going to be able to get a hard on for six months. UGHH really, no, that shit is gross. Bonner don't want to think of that and you should be ashamed for sending this question in.

It ain't hating if you right...but yo it IS tricking even if you got it

2009-01-09T17:56:00.000-08:00

5 Things Matt Bonner doesn't do:
1. Trick
2. Back down to punks like Kevin Garnett
3. Not listen to rap music every day
4. Eat oatmeal-that shit ain't baller they feed oats to horses and had to put some weird ass quaker on the box so people would forget about that. But yo Bonner don't forget.
5. Not hate- I was born a hater, Bonner So Mad

Chappelle's Show

The Playa Hater's Ball

Charlie Murphy Clips
Buy Chappelle's Show DVDs

Black Comedy
True Hollywood Stories

So I make my triumphant return to drunk and focused with hate on my heart. This whole it ain't tricking if you got movement is pathetic. Yo I got money but you don't see Bonner buying pussy with it. Hell you don't see Bonner buying a nice car either.

but you do see make me making money off cars...BALLER

Why you may ask? I credit Ice Cube dude told me not to be the one, and if girl is thinking lobster, fuck that I am thinking burger king.

I know everyone hates on 50 but anyone that can make Young Buck cry is a ok with me. I also enjoy making grown men cry

5o Cent - Shut ur bloodclot mouth

dance floor dale

2009-01-06T10:23:00.000-08:00

Sort of a late pass but this shit rules

directed for warp records flying lotus by Eric from tim and eric

tonite the third annual James Brown Celebration!

2009-01-06T10:08:00.000-08:00

We got some dynamite, amazing, hard working mcs and djs to bring you one of the best parties of this early year. We celebrating the godfather, our lord and savior, and the man who makes you get up to get down all night at the Tuesday Scissor Test tonite. We got Nobody Cares and Eyenine rapping and me and evaredy djing all night. We playing all thangs james from his tracks to the music he has influenced and is still influencing to this day. We can never praise James Brown enough. This is the third annual one and hopefully the biggest yet.

9-1 at the Red Door no cover and 2 dollar pbrs
107 State Street Portsmouth, NH

the greatest canadian band (well other than Rush)

2009-01-06T10:01:00.000-08:00

simply saucer - here come the cyborgs

mental sunday

2009-01-04T19:30:00.000-08:00

Whitehouse - wiggle like an eel
Andy (eat cloud) gave me this song like three years ago. I know Whitehouse was on some of their own shit fucking around with noise and what not in the early 80's and for better or worse a lot of people tried to sound like them afterwards. But this song is fucking brutal. I mean brutal. Definitely not for everyone but I know the scissor test kids love it.

yo pawn your vcr and shit POOKIE

2009-01-02T14:25:00.000-08:00

dj topcat - I need weed in my life

if it is 2009 and you don't have this track I feel bad!

2009-01-01T23:03:00.000-08:00

And no I can't help you other than give it to you and hope you come to your senses
bob james- nautilus

And yo that ghost joint is just one of the million songs that sample this track. In fact when this track dropped I was like 14 getting all buck and my old brother b2 was like really somebody sampled this track again. Old men hate too much.

But Serial every dj should have this track if not you probably think electro is shitty blog house. How the fuck did electro get jacked like that? It ain't right. But thats a whole nother post.

SHOUT OUT TO THE BIG DICK STYLE!

BOOTY CLAP----FREAKOUT

2008-12-29T17:52:00.000-08:00

Why in the hell did no one tell me Prince Paul made a video for booty clap. This just made my day

And tomorrow the monthly Freakout with MMOSS and Blaq Boose 9-1 at the red door. According to a freakout virgin they described hearing the freakout as just a bunch of people all fucked up on all types of drugs and drank. Ummm.....true but the music is really fucking DOPE!

And I been talking the shit out of MMoss hear on the blog (they are dude Justin's band) but if you wondering about blaq boose they are a tribe of bro/ho's who sing songs of ancient fields. we all own pot except for the ones who own beers. we use trombone, flute, trumpet, guitars, drums, synth and upright bass to make songs of enjoyment for the gods. we scramble not, yet in our haste to please we drink all the cups of drugs of dance and mostly scream. we want to burn the dead babies birdessess and paint our naked bodies with our blood but must care not for it. will you help us care and scream to the tune of our holy birth right of liberation from the townspeople?
Come early for the bands and me playing pysch/kraut/weiro rock and stoner metal, and stay late for the dance shit.

JAMES BROWN DAY

2008-12-25T12:15:00.000-08:00

We don't celebrate x-mas anymore its officially James Brown Day from now out

and just because this is drunk and focused and we know even our lord and saviors like to get drunk

the best thing about christmas this year

2008-12-25T11:37:00.001-08:00

DIPSET! DIPSET! DIPSET! or SKULLGANG! SKULLGANG! SKULLGANG!

The first time I watched this video I thought it was corny as fuck. The second time I watched this video I still thought it was corny as fuck. About the twentieth time I watched it I realized this may be one of the best x-mas videos ever done.

Hell it starts off with Jones writing a letter to what you may think is Santa Clause (but yo their's a twist at the end) and dude is like "I remember when mommy used to let me open up a present at midnight." That's emotion even Kayne can't fake with autotune. Plus Jones says its a recession and the gifts, and not to mention videos, cost cheddar. Blue Screen in full effect what! I think they donated their video budget to the salvation army. Jones so benvalent. Things I am also feeling about this video Jones quill pen complete with red feather, the making it snow with the dollars from the salvation army bucket (in the winter we don't make it rain anymore we make it snow on them hoes), and all the extreme close ups on Jim's face. But the best part of the video is the dude in the back who keeps dancing around ringing the bell. I would hire him just to come to parties with the bell and do that. And yo the twist is he ain't writing to santa he is writing to one of his boys locked up in jail. He finished the letter by dripping it in candle wax and writing love always (no ho-ho-homo)

Now this video also grew on me but its no where near on the level of awesome that Jones pulled off. Basically to me this video is Santana wanted to get laid by this girl Stella and her friends so he made this track. Girl can't really sing and Santana just kinda bounces around with a look of this pussy better be worth the $400 dollars I spent on this video, and he seems to be pondering will I be able to stick my dick in between the gap of this girls teeth tonite. Side note I watched this video about 8 times while ripping records at Evaredy's because it was the MTV jam of the week and we only watch rap videos at his house so we couldn't figure out who the skullgang was and had various theories (most being about Juelz being blatantly honest that he was putting these girls on because they gave great skull (you kids might know it as fellatio) turns out skullgang is like a dipset jv team. Who knew.

Snapple was a popular drank and still is

2008-12-23T14:58:00.000-08:00

I like add n to x's song about skills better than the gangstar joint. Also it's almost 2009 can we finally admit how bad Guru is? Yeah I know he has done SO MANY DOPE SONGS but who doesn't sound good over Premier's beats? Hell I can rap over his beats and sound good. He has a great voice true, but his lyrics are bad for a freshmen poetry class. But I will admit lemonaid was a popular drank and still is
add n to x - skills

old house monday we confused

2008-12-22T20:56:00.001-08:00

Armando - Land of Confusion

This songs fit the dreams I been having( side note I haven't smoked pot in days hence I am dreaming a lot and remembering them, and yes its wierd)

snowed in

2008-12-19T19:40:00.000-08:00

Since that old man winter decided to skeet all his white love everywhere I am snowed in, and instead of killing it at Recess tonight with Evaredy and Ghost Dad I am stuck at home dranking expresso martini's and cans of PBR(I keep it real, classy) and listening to records. Its like my own private Scissor Test. Anyway Christmas is coming up which means presents and hangovers, and since I am so benevolent I am giving the gift of seeing me dj the day after Christman with a whole grip of rappers and what not. Peep the flyer for full line-up

Now here is some of that nice Christian Christmas Music to listen to while funneling egg nog at your Christmas parties
You ever wonder what a pyche rock christmas song sounds like?
Free Design - Hold your breathe it's christmas
well know you do.

Next up is christmas music b-more style from the Unruly Crew. I want a beeper to for Christmas and maybe some gortex.
Unruly Mass Choir - Unruly Christmas

Next track is for those romantic nights when you are trying to pull that emotional girl whose all drunk on cheer and cookies and likes white rappers
Atmosphere - If I wasn Santa Clause

me I am hot like an oven

2008-12-18T17:25:00.000-08:00

Hot 8 brass band - sexual healing

it is one of those days

2008-12-17T19:51:00.000-08:00

Velvet Underground - Waiting for the Man

that old house monday

2008-12-15T22:32:00.000-08:00

This video was posted up on the hollerboard

How fucking awesome is this?

We back at with the old house monday and we coming today with one of Todd Terry's many aliases House of Gypsies.

And since we just got hit with a big ass ice storm I figured we needed some of the tropical sounding shit.
house of gypsies- sum si say

And a re-up on
Tu No Sabe - Pirates of the Carribean

drunk and focused is back

2008-12-14T12:52:00.001-08:00

Yo sorry the slacking on posts been making moves. Going to be moving to Denver in the new Year. Big going away parties still to come. Working on a getting a new website done, and putting out a mixtape. The 09 will be bigger than the beatdown De La Hoya got last weekend. Matt Bonner is returning to drunk and focused look out for his next post. Dude is blowing up and its gone straight to his head. He the best. Evaredy hates you all thats why he never posts. He is such an ashhole. Y'all should tell him it ain't hard to post a soul song and picture. In fact you can tell him this in person this coming Friday as we invade the Milky Way for a party with ghostdad.

Also I been digging through music the past few weeks trying to find those overlooked gems I have that I have totally forgot about. And I came across this early 80's track by Purple Flash. It fucking rules. Its this really pretty synth disco type shit from this dude from Canada. This song sounds like what Metro Area would make if they had done the soundtrack to Miami Vice.
Purple Flash - We can make it

RIP MC BREED

2008-11-26T10:58:00.000-08:00

old house not monday: Blame it on the dudes from the computer lab edition

2008-11-19T20:29:00.000-08:00

Shit I don't get Vol 1: So yo when I take my fully functioning, internet capable, and no real problem having ass laptop to the computer geeks at my school to figure out why I can't get online when I am in their library, (the only place in the world I can't get online because of their bullshit security settings) why do I end up leaving without the ability to get online anywhere? I am saying y'all did a 360 reverse tomahawk dunk of absolute failure on this one. You are the Chris "Birdman" Anderson of fixing computers.

And since that laptop is my dj laptop with most of my old house on it that is why this old house post is so late. Any way here is some old house music that even Birdman could smoke a joint too, and then miss so many dunks, I mean soo many dunks. What man do you have Woody Harrelson in you? What up Rosie Perez's titties and Jeopardy!

Anyway here is some Tom Chambers and Aresenio Hall

Now on to the house music with two artists we have featured here before, but this time different tracks, both very dope. Yep get the whistles out.
Tyree - Acid Over

2 Bad mice - hold it down

TOM CHAMBERS RUNS SHIT!

sidekick sunday

2008-11-16T19:12:00.000-08:00

This is the debut of a once and a long while feature at drunk and focused called sidekick Sunday. This is when we post songs from the high school friends and current weed carriers of them big time rappers. Its the feature for the Turtle of rap music.

And all you sidekicks have faith because even Turtle got a hand job from Meadow Soprano.

So yes indeed there is hope for the Tony Yayo's of the rap world. Drunk and Focused has your back homies!

This is even if you look like your 50, and I ain't talking 50 Cent, I am talking 50 years old.

Zing! Pow! Kick! Watch out! We got jokes for days!

But on the serious tip we celebrating the good side of rap nepotism with songs that are actually dope. Sometimes the crew love power is just too much. Sometimes they come together to form like voltron and provide you with a song to play when you are opening the night and staying away from big hits. But seriously who the fuck is playing ochhie wally wally at peak hours?

First up on Sidekick Sundays is the weed carriers of Snoop Dog, his crew and long time homies Daz and Kurupt, The Dogg Pound(no Arsenio).

This is actually, well technically, a Snoop track, but in reality it is just a Dogg Pound track featuring Nate Dogg and Snoop. Basically it is a track Snoop made to get his good homies laid. This is Snoop being the ultimate wing man. Which proves my longstanding theory that Snoop is so benevolent.

snoop ft dogg pound and nate dogg - ain't no fun

rap music is the fountain of youth

2008-11-16T14:20:00.000-08:00

People on the internet been wonder what happened to Perv?

And yo y'all excuse my lack of posts but I been out killing shit. Internet was on hold as I partied. I celebrated Evaredy's official old head status as one of them 30 year olds Friday night with a huge Get Stupid! throw-down at the red door with big homie dj Ghost Dad and Chris Devlin. Pictures coming soon, but if you missed it you'se a fool for that. And for those that think NH people can't dance y'all were mistaken.

That crowd was up and shaking their asses all night long. Shout out to all the scissor test kids who came out to party and made the regular friday martini sipping red door crowd scared to death. Booties were shaking everywhere. And big shout to my drunk and focused podna Evaredy for becoming old, and that is even if he still looks like he is 18. Rap music is the fountain of youth. Ask Kool Keith he will tell ya

And Yo I am buying those siberian videos for Evaredy as a late b-day present. God Bless rap music
Kool Keith, What What, High and Mighty, and Bobitto - Hands on Experience

side note how awesome is Copperfield's jazz hands in that picture

Yeah he totally bit that shit from me

OBAMA

2008-11-05T20:12:00.000-08:00

He done did it.

But the real question is now what happens to all the old angry rappers who needed four more years of an out of touch white dude to spring their rap comebacks on? I am saying a Paris come back is no longer in the works, and well if you heard his Bush Jr shit you'd realize this a great day because that shit sucked. But let us not forget on this glorious day what a young, angry, and hungry Paris sounded like
Paris - panther Power

But on the real we moving on up!

America has been seperate but not equal too many years...Texas is Turning Blue

2008-11-03T12:23:00.000-08:00

H Town All Stars (Bun B,Chamillionaire, Paul Wall,Cory Mo, and Trae - Obama 08

ol house monday can you feel it?

2008-11-03T09:06:00.000-08:00

This is one of the first and one of my favorite house records I ever owned, or well inherited from my big brother B2. So this record has a special place in my heart and I finally got around to ripping it. Call it an early gift to make you sure y'all get out and vote for Obama tomorrow.
Josh Wink - hypnotizing (remix)

Josh Wink - Hypnotizing (live remix)

Mr. Fingers -Can You Feel It (Martin Luther King mix

VOTE

WHY WE SO DOPE?

2008-10-29T10:38:00.000-07:00

Drunk and Focused Posse in full effect with another fly ass all vinyl mix for our girl dj Stef and Ve Radio. This time we kept it strictly rap music. Blunt Recordings what? Nothing new just good old fashioned rap music

grab it here A Drunk and Focused Ve Radio
1.The Changing World - George Benson (1974 CTI)
2.Get Tha Fortune - Cash money click (1994 Blunt Recordings)produced by Dj Irv
3.4 My Click - Cash Money Click (1994 Blunt Recordings)produced by Dj Irv
4.Next Level (Nyte Time Mix) - Show and AG (1995 Payday)
produced by Dj Premier
5.Put it On - Big L (1994 Columbia) Buck Wyld
6.You Can't Front (...It is Real) - Diamond D ft. Sadat X
and Lord Finesse Produced by Diamond
(1993 Chemistry Records)
7.I Ain't Trippin(extended remix) - Too Short (Jive Records) produced by Too Short and Al Eaton
8.Who's the Mack - Ice Cube (1990 Priority Records)
Produced by The Bomb Squad
9.Breaker 1/9 (Beatnuts Remix) - Common Sense ( 1992 Relativity Records) produced by the Beatnuts
10. No Equal - The Beatnuts (1993 Relativity) produced by The
Beatnuts
11.Supa Star (Inst.) - Group Home (1994 Payday/) produced by
Dj Premier
12.Livin' Proof - Group Home (1995 Payday)
produced by Dj Premier
13.Tonz 'O' Gunz - Gang Star (1994 Chrysalis) Dj Premier
14.Stay Real - Erick Sermon (1993 Rush Assoiciated Labels)
Erick Sermon
15.Battle Dril - Saafir (1994 Qwest Records)
16.Get The Girl, Grab the Money and Run - Souls of Mischief
(1994 Jive)
17.Soul Flower (2 tha 3 Mix) - The Pharcyde
(1993 Delicious Vinyl)

Keith Sweat to the rescue

2008-10-24T10:37:00.000-07:00

Yo your boy beat perv is going through a rough patch. I know its hard to imagine anyone with swagger like mine can have trouble, but its true, yo boy perv got dumped. I blame rap music. And puking on that Bulgarian did not help. Regardless, I am looking to Keith Sweat to make me realize just how good I had it. So from now on I am living by the Too Short/Keith Sweat code of life. Yes ladies beware because on the real I am so handsome it makes even Keith Jealous. Hell, I am so good looking I am going take it to charity with a win a dream date with beat perv coming too a reality near you soon contest. Also drunk and focused posse are re-releasing our smash hit mix-cd "The Hot Young Studs", it seems just right to do. (Plus that it's a one year old re-release and the fact we did a really dope mix which I lost the master tom and after realizing how good it was in evaredy's car a couple weeks ago, realized it was so dope we ought to give it away for free, and pretend we just sold out of the original cd's because girls eat up our mixes like they playing Hungry hungry hippos. Word Up Board Games! AND BIG NEWS so many mixes coming soon. BIG TINGS COMING I AM REFOCUSED GRAB OUR VE RADIO MIX AT VERADIO.COM RAP MUSIC RAP MUSIC! RAP MUSIC!!!! drunk and focused review.

Keith you sad clown genius. Who else would think to have a bozo the clown looking dude play the saxophone like he was on set of the rumpshaka video? But you took it to the next level and instead of having him on a beach, you set the shit to happen at the sexiest carnival ever. I am talking Marky Mark Fingerbanging Reese Witherspoon in fear on the roller coaster shit. How's your mother y'all?

Next we cut to Keith Sweat's mansion. Shit is pimp. Of course it is he is Keith Sweat! But then out of the blue his girl leaves him. He is hurt so he sits on his awesome bed and laments. Maybe he thinks damn this bed is comfy? Shit I would think that too if I had a fly bed like that. Maybe he thinks did Keith Sweat just lose a bitch? Nah, Keith, he doesn't think like that. He thinks damn I am so awesome and girls love me that I am going to sing some sad song to get girls to try out this comfy bed with me, and if I am lucky we can go all three bears and goldylocks on their asses. This is what Keith Sweat refers to as blumpkins (kids look it up on google or some shit).

Keith in sadness goes back to the carnival-no Wyclef.

Then this little white girl steals a balloon from the sad clown, its yellow, and she gives it to Keith who releases it in the air. Balloon flies away. Its all very heartbreaking and French.

The rest of the video well is wack for Keith Sweat standards. It's like a 900 number for being a bitch. Then as usual standard super sexy bathrobe/wardrobe for singing about girls. Then we go back to the carnival, blah blah boring, he gets back with this girl I think. She is on a merrry go round. Yeah she is circling. Keith gets back with her and then tells the clown to watch. Well that is what I am assuming. Keith Sweat needs to stay away from carnivals. Sad Clowns and taking back broads who broke your heart is not a good look. I think my homeboy lost it. Y'all be the judge

old house monday: on a monday?

2008-10-20T09:34:00.000-07:00

So the sox lose to a team named after the sun or some shit, and that had to take the devil out of their name because their pussy ass fans who never gave a shit about their team until they started winning could be pacified. What the fuck. I hate philly teams with a passion, but guess what at least their fans give a fuck. Fuck them the rays lets go Phillies y'all need to win something and us boston fans have been spoiled too long. Y'all better not lose to to the mormons of the baseball game. Now with that out of the way we onto the house music, and I got to bring out one of my personal favorite house tracks of all time to get me through this tough time of watching a bunch of dudes with shitty ass mohawks beat my team.
gershon jackson - snare your ass off

old house not monday: Dudes without shirts version aka Get Your Ass Hammered

2008-10-16T09:51:00.000-07:00

So last night I was at the Red Door with Evaredy playing what used to be reggae night; a weekly they had to stop because the cops always came, including that one time for pesky felony when some girl got a martini glass busted across her face.

Good Vibes man, good vibes.

So we filled in for the night to do our usual mix of old rap, soul, house, and club. So as always we killed it. Then in walks this dude with a big bear of man on his side, both in leather jacket straight out of Grease. Then dude starts dancing with moves that looked like a cross between a shitty uprock by some old b-boy with too fat laces, and the raver hand motion thang. You knew the raver hand motion thang.

So I am sipping on a drink while evaredy brings us into house territory and homie comes up and wonders what happened to reggae night and why are we playing music for gay guys and lesbians. He just wanted to dance and he tells me, "I can't do my dance routine to this shit." And that he wasn't homophobic because his dad was gay, but I needed to stop playing this men on films shit.

So of course when I got back on and made sure to take to the rave even more, and then when I look up what do I see? None other than leather jacket homie with gay dad in the middle of the dance floor, shirtless, having what looks to be a dance off with a black dude who kind of looked like preppy version of Cameo. Yes, word up. Where is my whistle at.

Side note shout out to the gay dads out there. Thats the second time in the last few months somebody at the club has been wilding out and has came to the booth to tell us about their gay father. The last was this British girl with two cheeky gay dads, one of them which told the bartender's little brother to dance seductively with his daughter because all though she would not sleep with him she would love it regardless. Yeah, so this has nothing to really do with anything other than kids with gay dads love the drunk and focused posse.

Here's your house track
E-Dancer - Pump the Move (Kenny Larkin mix)

drunkandfocused.com

2008-10-14T10:14:00.000-07:00

We back. I am done moving. I am back in Boston. It's Tuesday and our new feature called records I play out on Tuesdays. I been running scissor test for over three years and now it has evolved. Back in the day it was just me and the homie Lemon Red playing club rap and b-more club. Then he left for NYC and Diplo and I started booking live bands who gave scissor test its identity. And now three years later we still the best spot to hear the best bands and club music in the land. So starting this Tuesday drunkandfocused.com will drop tracks I am playing at scissor test (or have played a lot in the past three years) No requirement for these tracks other than they be dope.
Freestyle Fellowship - When The sun took a day off

Stark Reality - So Much Tenderness

Babe Ruth - The Mexican

Master P - I need dubz (zilla remix)

D'Vo and Strom - Dudes in da house

dj Spinn and dj Rashad- that booty

It's saturday

2008-10-04T06:46:00.000-07:00

You probaly think I am going to post some happy go lucky saturday songs now right? But you are wrong. Dead wrong. We getting all emotional and shit now. Word first up is some of that echo and the bunnymen for my cutters, and cool kids at camp. (whoever gets that rap reference gets seven pies of various flavors and they all delicous)
echo and the bunnymen - the cutter

Next up is something to come down sunday morning after you do way too much acid and have a conversation in the forest of knowledge surrounded by gum drop trees, bushes of platinum (they hot like fire) and converse with a man who resembles KRS ONe but is actually a rock named Fred.
Forest - Graveyard

Last is one of those epic driving songs when you are pulling away from the house you just burned down and the cops have yet to start chasing you and you have just pulled into a motel to drank a beer and peer out the window
Mercury Rev - Goddess on Highway

And fuck it is Saturday so we going out with some of that happy go lucky I am doing the hustle cause it keeps me thin shit
dj amaze - boys and girls

KOKO B WARE

2008-10-03T12:36:00.000-07:00

PILEDRIVER WHAT UP BAM BAM BIGGELOW

YES WE VERY LAZY on the blog tip BUT don't fret cause we got TONS OF MIXES COMING from the drunk and focused posse including an OLD RAP mix for VE RADIO, a B-More and Philly club set mixed live by Evaredy, and my FREAKOUT MIX

KEEP CHECKING BACK

BIG TINGS COMING

WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO RICK MARTEL

WHY AM I YELLING????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

don't be mad we haven' posted in awhile but new site coming plus I am moving but in the meantime

2008-10-03T12:27:00.001-07:00

Also don't vote

Holy shit this is horrid

Seriously vote, but this shit is embarassing, but how good does Halle Berry look? Seriously my vote is to skeet on her.

Also how dumb is Palin? I mean would she be the type of girl who you would tell hey I am going to marry you so we can have sex now and that god won't let her get pregnant so you could bust in her without a condom...ooopps thats her daughter

germans love house music

2008-09-22T11:19:00.000-07:00

What do you get one you cross a german who loved Afrika Bambatta and a kraftwerk sample?
Yeah I know what your thinking a new david hasselhoff mashup? But your wrong. Very Wrong.

Answer is you get this old house classic

West Bam - Monkey see monkey do

Drunk and focused Posse Tonight move your body like a ballerina drunk on bacardi

2008-09-18T07:42:00.000-07:00

Yeah no flyer cause our word to mouth swag is legendary. But tonight Beat Perv and Evaredy in full effect at the red door from 10-1 after the old dudes stop playing their free jazz music

And here is some Biz Markie he comes and does the wop at our parties
biz markie - return of the biz dance

biz markie - make the music with your mouth

scissor test tonight straight from b-more

2008-09-16T12:30:00.000-07:00

This is what came up when I googled Rick Weaver.

Although this picture is awesome it is not the baltimore Rick Weaver and the Ruined Frame. This is Baltimore's Rick Weaver and the Ruined Frame and he is part of Human Host, and this is his new solo project and should be fucking awesome. Not to mention Brian Levin and jack Blackwater are playing. SHit starts at 9 at the red door with no cover and 2 dollar pbrs. Plus 11-1 I play rap, house and club music. Word

Also this new order song is almost as awesome as that picture
new order - salvation theme

old house anyday

2008-09-16T10:42:00.000-07:00

Yeah its tuesday not monday, but its still old house monday. No complaints just great old house. This week it's Harddrive (Masters at Work)- deep inside The reason on the upcoming crossfaded bacon ep Emynd straight murders this track. Pick that shit up when it drops on flaming hotz in the next week or so. I highly recommend you go out and cop that shit as soon as possible, and also check out Emynd's new bounce site Nola Bounce
And to keep the remix feel going here is what deep inside was a take off of

rap music, just some rap music

2008-09-11T13:02:00.000-07:00

Not enough rap on this blog these days. Maybe when evaredy starts doing his ditc posts (thats literal and not literal, best of both worlds, no r kelly) more rap and classic soul and funk will be up, but until that great day I am just going to at random throw up rap songs. Why? Because the world needs more rap music, well not from you timmy(yes Whitey I am talking to you), but good old rap music like Thirstin Howell III

thirstin howell III - welfare pussy

God bless Keith Sweat vol. freedom

2008-09-11T09:18:00.000-07:00

In honor on freedom and fucking, which is the greatest freedom in the world and imagine a world where Keith Sweat videos with broads in full out burkas? That is a world I don't want to live in. So to celebrate we are returning to a drunk and focused favorite when we watch Keith Sweat videos.

This video is for the "Nobody" track and it of course starts out with Keith looking dapper in a white suit. Fuck Tom Wolfe Kieth makes that white suit his own. Of course next is a hot broad walking down the street in a flowing overcoat looking like a pitbull with adina howard thighs. Then a familar theme in Keith videos him driving, this time in a black suit cause he is sad and wants to show this women how much he needs her. Real talk is hey baby sex was fun and I am going to pretend to be really sad so I can have sex with you one more time. Is that cool baby? Then in true Keith fashion he breaks down the truth that nobody can freak her and please her like he could. I said it before, and I will say it again, God Bless Keith Sweat.

Then out of nowhere the girl starts singing and she is with cho cho milk drinking Clocker starring baldhead bastard that is not Omar Epps but wig wearing eminem bestfriend mekhi phifer!

Then you realize the pitbull with thighs is not the one singing and this broad singing is down with Keith sweats friend the choo choo milk drinking clocker. Of course she rather have sex with Keith, but he's taking so she is going to sing the hook for him and hook up with his man. What a great girl she is. Song ends with Keith driving around looking fly looking for his next booty call.

If there is a man who inspires freedom better than Keith I just don't know who that man is.

PS Keith Sweat got Palin's daughter pregnant

thank you cam

2008-09-10T17:10:00.000-07:00

Holy shit just when I say hey its getting colder out. No more beach. Where is the remote. And wondering who I can get a record deal for. Out comes a song like this.
Streve Brule should be on the hook, "Just hit the pussy hole dummy...for your health"

camron - pussy hole

ol house mond...err wednesday

2008-09-10T10:27:00.000-07:00

Yeah I been slacking on my blog macking and missed monday but its all good I was working on a new rap mix with Evaredy for ve radio thats dope as hell. All classic rap mix, all vinyl, and all mixed to perfection by the drunk and focused posse. I just have to do the drops and send it over to Dj Stef and it should be up in the next few days. And yes we drop Ja Rule's to start the mix off, and no you will not be mad at all we did. Blunt Recordings what Up! Question do you think Frankie Cutlass and Mic Geronimo hang out these days? And why did they change the record label name from Blunt Recordings to Murder Inc.? Well I am kind of glad they did cause murder inc is wack as hell, but Blunt records that shit was average as fuck, but hey at least they gave us the masta ic single and cash money click.

Now onto the house music

Farley "Jackmaster" Funk reworks the think break. If you like b-more club, or any dance music in general than you love the think break. Its of course best known for the "It Takes Two" sample but its pretty much one of the most essential breaks of all time for b-more and hip-house influenced music.
precious red - think

You ever wonder what the c and c stood for in c and c music factory? Well its Clivellis and Cole and this is a good track they did called pride. When I was 11 I would have smacked my future self for liking c and c music factory but guess what young kids are dumb. Thats why they young, cause they supposed to be dumb. Old heads recgonize dope shit. See getting old ain't that bad
clivellis and cole - Pride

Pop it for Perv

2008-09-04T16:35:00.000-07:00

This track is my secret weapon so good, and to boot its a real easy mix into back that ass up. Come to the red door tonite drunk and focused posse in full effect from 10-1 playing soul, rap , house, and club. And its free as soon as the old dudes stop playing jazz.
bun, juvenille, and webbie - pop it 4 pimp

ol house monday get yo cameras ready...prepare to flash

2008-09-01T20:55:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite producers of all time and I have slept on this track forever. Evaredy with the assist on this shit. Holy shit is this so good, and you know I am dropping this tomorrow at the scissor test.
green velvet - Flash

You know? Fucking rap music.

2008-08-28T11:44:00.000-07:00

Drunk and Focused Posse in full effect tonight playing rap music in Dover. THis is the last rap music thursday before we take over and start doing shit for the hipsters and the bands that want to be on TRL on Thursdays. Ummm yeah don't worry me and evaredy will still kill it regardless of how the night is promoted because we that good. Anyway here is one of the best rappers before he sold the fuck out, sorry Cube, but family movies is not a good look. But back in the day who the fuck could fuck with ice cube? He was def top ten best all time. Fuck you if you think different. Man I miss old Ice Cube.
Ice Cube - wrong nigga to fuck with

Ice Cube - Steady Mobbing

the internet says your pants our sagging

2008-08-27T11:28:00.000-07:00

I grabbed this track off the mad decent blog
dj tragic - pants are sagging
This shit is like hard house on acid they got from b-more, with the ease out drug being E. Holy shit i feel dirty about how much I love this track. I feel like this is a track the modern day Dj Irene (does she still dj?) would be dropping while doing the truffle shuffle. I am sure the kids on the internet love this for reasons they have no idea why. Thank god I didn't do drugs as a high school kid, or this blog might be praising happy hardcore. I am sorry rap fans but I am like a black kid that grew up in the suburbs and like Poison (the rock group not new jack song), I can't help that I like this shit. And for the haters at least they sampled a rap track for this song.

no one has swagger like beat perv

2008-08-27T10:56:00.000-07:00

I know the internets has been kind of fifty-fifty hating or loving this shit, but fuck this shit is fucking good. Jay Z is like a fucking horror movie villain every time you think he is dead or about to fall off he comes back ten times harder, and changes up his shit to show you why he has to be considered one of the best. I have always liked Jay, but I appreciate him a lot more these days, plus dude is older than Rakim. You realize that? Shit is insane. But TI is the show stealer here, and I will still argue that TI is the best rapper alive, sorry wayne you good on this track ,and you the most popular rapper alive these days, but TI is still the king of the south. Holy shit does he kill it on this track, and I also ain't mad at Kayne for the auto tune shit, he actually sounds good with it, no cher. Plus they sample MIA for it. White girls will love it, mix it with paper planes and they are happy and buying you drinks. What the hell else do you want?
TI, Lil wayne, Kayne, Jay Z - Swagger Like Us
Also thank Jay Z for one of my favorite lines, "we can't wear skinny jeans because our nuts don't fit"

ol house monday just shut up and dance

2008-08-26T14:34:00.000-07:00

Shut Up And Dance - Lamborghini
One of my favorite songs to sample the sweet dreams beat. These dudes made some ridicolously good beats, they also had no boundaries sampling wise, hence why they got sued in 1992 and pretty much almost drove them out of existence. Fuck sample laws. I understand its a fine line, and the original artists want that money, but really fuck a sample law. These dudes also couldn't get signed so they said fuck it and started the own label releasing Ragga Twins and Nicolette.

ragga twins - hooligan 69

nicolette - oh na na

26th annual beat perv celebration featuring Human Host, Height, and Jack Blackwater

2008-08-19T14:36:00.000-07:00

TONIGHT!

The 26 annual celebration of BEat Perv
featuring
HUman Host
Height (wham city records)
and local favorite
JAck BLackwater

plus rap, booty, house, and club music all night lomg

Are you there Old House monday, it's me Beat Perv

2008-08-18T18:23:00.000-07:00

The first time I heard Kc Flight track was the planet e track mostly because of the talking head sample, and then later on the front 2 back track with playgroup that dropped in 97 or so. Anyway this KC Flightt track that grew on me a lot, and you may have heard it from the bob sinclair remix. I don't know shit about Bob Sinclair (other than dude is huge in some circles, but not so much the drunk and focused circle) but I think that remix was big?? Maybe who cares play the original, or you have to drop a remix make sure it's the wonka remix.

But if you play the wonka version make sure its warm out and their are girls from Europe dancing on E. Otherwise stick to the original
kc flight - voices

Next up is Armando one of the early Chicago House pioneers and his first 12 inch which dropped in 1988. Also dude died of leukemia back in 96(when he was only fucking 26, fuck I am turning 26 in two days) which I just found out via the internet trying to find out what he was up to these days. Anyway enjoy the track its so good Kirsty Alley said it was better than her favorite past time: donut fishing. For those who don't know thats when Kirtsty Alley gets in her hot tub and has her two of her hired help (they also sponge bath her like a walrus at the aquarium) take fishing polls of various baked snacks such as ding dongs, sno balls, ho ho's, and the occasional tasty cake cup cake and Kirsty leaps out like a seal and snatches the treat. Kisty Alley loves working out for her treats, god bless her. But yeah this track is as good as a tasty cake. What up WaWA
Armando - 100% Dissing You remix

This is one of my favorite house tracks ever. It's like pink lemonade, and always a good choice, not to mention a popular drink. I see you Guru you we on the same level.
circle children - zulu dub mix

Next is something useful for the djs the accapella for Barbara Tucker's I get lifted (acc)

booty post

2008-08-15T11:42:00.000-07:00

dj slugo - freaky ride

tyrone davis - here it comes

Yeah I know she never won Wimbeldon, but goddamn does she inspire a booty music post. Holy shit and y'all wonder why my girl is a tennis player, ummm she is classy so I won't say its a nice booty for days. But so much booty shit going down this coming tuesday for the 26 year celebration of beat perv featuring b-more's finest weirdos Human Host and Height. Booty and special guests to come.

SCISSOR TEST

Plans for a boston scissor test in the works.

UMMMMM BOOOOOOOTTYYYYYYY

old motherfucking house...fuck a monday I always play this shit out

2008-08-12T14:21:00.000-07:00

House house house
Yeah one week late but fuck so much good tracks first is Adonis
Adonis - No Way Back

Next is some kraftwerk rework (this is a kraftwerk rework right or at least sample?? if not I am an idiot)
steve p - computer madness
THis makes germans go crazier than david hasselhoff drunk in a bikini eating burgers and whipping naked girls from baywatch with his hot dog, no penis, hot dog
kraftwerk - b- sides
Lastly my third favorite remix of this brighter days song. This is useful once in awhile and even though its a "trance" mix its really dope, I promise. The underground goodie remix kills this track but sometimes when your set is going this way you will thank me for this track, actually thank cajmere I just pirated it from him
cajmere - brighter days (trance mix)

rip bernie mac

2008-08-12T07:44:00.000-07:00

I ain't scared of you motherfuckers
juvenille - how I be leaning

yeah I know random juvenille song for no reason

freakout friday

2008-08-08T14:50:00.000-07:00

Bruce Haack - incantation

As much as I love rap and house music most of the kids know me for playing weird shit. Bruce Haack has a weird relationship with the devil and electronic music. He makes music that sounds like the soundtrack to the devil fucking one of his electronic bitches, usually vicky from my little robot. Ohh, you didn't know, yeah that bitch went to hell when the show got cancelled. Yeah maybe y'all should not have been so selfish and watched the show so they could have got some more episodes in and a better syndication deal, so she could have lived in reruns. Jesus does not fuck d list robots. But Satan, that satan will fuck anything.

Drunk History

2008-08-07T10:38:00.000-07:00

this shit is so good, and if you wondering, yes I dj like this sometimes. WE DA BEST! There is like 3 or four more drunk history videos if you want to search the youtube. the jack black and clark duke shit is so great. I recommend them all. They are even funny sober.

I am just Drunk

2008-08-02T21:47:00.000-07:00

Its true the drunker I get the more these synopsis of episodes of the first season of 12 oz mouse make sense. And if you wondering this is the season we sampled on the last Drunk and focused posse VE Radio mix.

1 Hired
Mouse Fitzgerald has been out of work most of the month. He's late on his rent payment, and the landlord is ready to forcibly evict him. Mouse Fitzgerald takes his pool stick down to the billiards hall and stakes his last bit of money. He wins, and returns just in time to pay up. Skillet remains unaware of Fitzgerald's gambling stunt, and thanks the Lord Jesus.
2 Signals
The 12oz. Mouse has painted a portrait of a Black Jesus. Suddenly there is a run of good luck all around him - Skillet wins two bets in the same day! But they must choose - does Mouse Fitzgerald get to enter the painting in a contest for the art gallery? Or does the painting stay in the living room?
3 Rooster
Mouse Fitzgerald plans to celebrate Rooster's new job. But then they find out he didn't get it because he is a couple years too old to meet Shark's requirements.
4 Spider
Mouse Fitzgerald's old army buddy visits. He is now a wealthy TV minister, and offers Fitzgerald a job. The 12oz. Mouse turns it down after dishonest tactics are revealed.
5 Rememorized
During a schoolroom history class, the Eye calls George Washington a racist because he was a slave owner. The Eye gets suspended from school and sent home. Rhoda and Liquor try to persuade the Eye to apologize for his statement.
6 Sharktasm
Skillet finds a sexually explicit book in the house. He is surprised when it turns out to belong to Spider Boy. However, Spider Boy's college boyfriend is only using it for a school paper.
7 Adventure Mouse
Mouse Fitzgerald has sold a painting, but the art customer turns out to be one of Skillet's old enemies. Skillet throws the man out and refuses to let Mouse Fitzgerald do the work. The 12 Oz. Mouse runs away from home to live and work at the art patron's house, but is unable to paint in the new, peaceful environment.

Holy shit does Swayzee fucking suck

2008-08-01T18:39:00.000-07:00

Yo Fuck these rich ass wack ass motherfuckers. You all sound like a fucking lamer version of Crazy Town, at least their lead singer is on drugs what the fuck is you guys excuse?

Can somebody tell the kids to stop being fucking idiots. Yes its cool to make money, corporate or not, yeah we get it, but fuck this bullshit mentality that it can be shitty music because they have their tongue in cheek and rich. If you like this shit and your not fifteen you should be shot in the face. Their fans are young and dumb what the fuck is your excuse, these sallies make the Monkees look hard as fuck. FUCK YOU Swayzee go back to malibu with this bullshit. Kids listen to fucking rap music it will benefit you in the long run

Also I will skeet skeet skeet on this girls faces just on principle. Fuck the bullshit its 2008 and we still being duped.

In Bay We Trust cause Theo Make Change

2008-07-31T14:15:00.000-07:00

Bye Manny

camron ft. juelz santana- we make change
I loved Manny but dude kind of fell the fuck off this season. We get it your quirky, and you like making money. You helped us win two world series, and next season you were looking at making either 20 mill from the sox, or some big ass contract with somebody else then you went all craZy and forced a trade. Cool Nomar was a salty sally too towards the end, and now y'all are reunited on the dodgers, but per usual dude is hurt. Plus I heard Jason Bay is Canadien, and has hung out with Alan Thicke multiple times. Word plus his numbers are indentical to Manny which would have made this trade a wash if the sox weren't paying for manny's contract (not that I give a fuck as a fan I want my team to make it rain on these players like hos to keep them happy) and giving up Brandon Moss and Craig Hansen, well not that those dudes were that good or were ever going to be better than average, but its the principle right? But yeah Sox are winning the series again they just turned the team into an underdorg group of scrappers who like chewing tobacco and fist fights.

TONIGHT we Get Dirty like that bastard

2008-07-31T13:45:00.000-07:00

I am doing this for the kids. Eighteen plus and the drunk and focused posse will be in full effect dropping rap, house, club, booty, and even some of that tight panced dance shit. This is the jump off and come september this should be a weekly party.

You Don't Ever Catch the Dragon Dad

2008-07-30T10:49:00.000-07:00

Yo I found this via the hater

YOU ARE FAGS

Ummm yeah. This is why I can't wake up early in the morning and plus the shit that is on late night is so much better. Fuck the sun, the moon is much cooler. Think about one hundo a day thats five hundo a week and thats rich. words to live by

keith sweat videos volume 3

2008-07-29T11:33:00.000-07:00

Yo is Keith Sweat fucking with more keys than a janitor?? Only if those keys ain't coke, and we talking about the keys to a hot broads bedroom. This video starts off with keys, and wierd water shit that kinda looks like a combination of chinese water torture, or some wierd way to make crack. Then we see Keith in jail and some good looking girl in nice cars on the ocean, I think she owns a boat. But wait a minute Keith is on the boat! yes Keith Sweat owns a boat. You realize crooning pays well this brother is rich bitch! Then Keith is sauve and tells the bitch to take her shoes off. I think she has a foot massage in her future! Then Keith throws her shoes in the ocean and croons about how she is in the mood. Dude way to jump on the barefoot and pregnant shit at least 9 months early, come on wait till your semin is inside for that. Can we talk about keith's outit for a minute? First he is wearing a zubaz print tee and jeans straight out of 94, then he tops it in jail with an all denim outfit, what up square dancing cause dude looks like a white dude that loves country, is he keith sweat or toby keith? Shout out to that all white outfit with the miami hat, is that shit starter brand? Then we get a wierd scene of both Keith and his bitch in all pinstripes, shit looks a weird gay orgy between A-Rod and Jeter. Or maybe Burt and Ernie when they have an all dude sex themed yankee night.

Next he dressed up like Montell Jordan, which proves this is not how you do it being suave. Then more shots of the beach and then him in jail. All this video showed me is Keith Sweat might get the girls, but he dresses like a back up singer in a kriss kross video.

one hundo a day...we rich

2008-07-29T09:56:00.001-07:00

sometimes you just need a booty post

2008-07-29T09:22:00.001-07:00

In honor of Steve Sander's wife here are some booty tracks. Y'all realize 90210 is coming back with Micheal from the wire, the mom from arrested development, Aunt Becky from Full House, Kelly Taylor as the school pyschiologist, and Brenda Walsh as a famous actress and director. Please Tell me they are bringing back Steve Sanders too. Pretty please. This show is going to be so much better than Degrassi High the next generation. You bring back snake but not wheels? Come on what about wheels man. Anyway booty music

dj Ht - slow fuck

dj funk - booty clap

Tuesday Freakout

2008-07-29T08:50:00.000-07:00

The Monthly Freakout is back with MMOSS tonite at the scissor test and this times with 99 percent more light shows. MMoss will be freaking out most of the night and I will be playing pysch, ansd kraut records early in the night, and club shit late night. As always no cover, 2 dollar pbrs and it goes down at the red door. Also this thursday Dirty is jumping off at the Dover Brickhouse. I am going to be playing for the kids, its 18 plus y'all and there are two bands playing.

Also BOSTON stand up I'll be playing beat research with the big homie Ghostdad this monday at beat research the great party thrown by Flack and Wayne and Wax. Also supposedly we got some big guests swing late night, either way Boston ain't ready.
Also check out Ghostdad and Nick Yoder's all vinyl mix for VE Radio They kill it.

old house monday...we been searching

2008-07-28T15:29:00.000-07:00

Ok, I missed a week (two if you count that half ass A-Rod stardust madonna shit...anyway we back) and thats only because we at drunk and focused love you a lot and wanted to dig deep to find some house tracks we really love, but also really don't know much about. First up is a track off the new mad decent podcast, and a track I always overlooked because the name of the group reminded me of some Johnny Depp Pirates of the Caribbean shit. I don't know why I was picturing the music to sound like a naked dude playing bongos, no Matthew, while some far out space chick dressed in green; green like her skin color and not her outfit. I am saying her outfit is probably beach tasteful, you know sandals and shit, and she goes, "I really dig this vibe." Even though I used to play a lot of latin house(that was back when I was all young and sexy and djed under my government name..like four years ago but still I was eight years old in 1990 you gotta excuse my ignorance on some of this house shit, plus my brother was B2 so I grew up listening to mostly just rap music.) Anyway this track is off the Pirates of the Carribean vol.III release and thank dirty south joe for dropping this track and educating my dumb ass. Also this just proves that I am an idiot and have so much more to learn about house, and hence why I do this every monday because this ain't just for the kids its for the beat perv too, and this why I listen to mixes so I can search and find out this shit was produced by Armand Van Helden (house dudes have TOO MANY FUCKING ALIAS) and is fucking an unreal track. It was first released in 1994 on Strictly Rhythm and was the b side. Once again B-side wins
Tu No Sabe _ Pirates of the Carribean

Next up is 33 1/3 queen who evaredy and I dropped on a mix a little while back ( speaking of that mix Evaredy I need it cause I done lost it). We killed that mix so much dope shit from ugk to old house and juke shit. Man we dope. Anyway the artist is 33 1/3 Queen and I used to always think this was some UK shit, but as usual I was wrong. This is a project of dj Mandrill who has been djing since before I was born and got his start out in DC and B-More area. Who knew. Either way these tracks are slamming and will still kill a dance floor.
33 1/3 Queen - Searching

33 1/3 Queen - tun this mother out

Next up is some guys( I assume its a duo) that almost have the same name is that shitty australian duo (they were Australian right?) that sung the safety dance. Yeah those dudes suck, but these dudes do not.
Two Men Without Hats - the breeze

Lastly some hip house for that ass. This track is crucial and if you doing a hip house set do yourself a favor and drop this.
fast eddie - Let's Go

where is old house monday?

2008-07-22T12:53:00.000-07:00

I know the loyal ten fans of drunk and focused have been up in arms in the lack of updates lately, especially the old house monday, well we have good excuses at least, no serial I promise. Basically beat perv has been working on a new three year anniversary scissor test mix, and trying to get the new site up. So this summer is going to be drunk and focused lazy. Don't worry in the next day or so I am going to do a really big old house post to make up for the lack of posts. Until then we got you covered. First up is the new Mad Decent Podcast with Dirty South Joe who fucing MURDERS the classics, its like an ol house monday all star mix, holy shit, SO GOOD and to boot done live with no headphones (I saw Dirty South Joe Live in B-more this past friday and he killed it with No Headphones)
Dirty South Joe - Maddecent Podcast History of B-More Club vol. 1
Here's the playlist with commentary by the godfather Scottie B
Here's the tracklisting, along with a word or two from Scottie B to put things in perspective:
1. Andrew Dice Clay - Mother Goose (Dance Club Instrumental)
"Woke Technics out of a sleep over this."
2. Petra & Co - Just Let Go (dub)
"One of those house jawns that bridged club."
3. Oji - Original Man
"Great take on number 2."
4. Masters At Work - The Ha Dance
"See 2."
5. Circle Children - Zulu (Braxton Intro)
"See 2."
6. Pirates Of The Caribbean - Tu No Sabe
"See 2 again...Armand again!!!"
7. Big City - Spanish Lesson
"DJ Freeze...people was like "oh shit!!!""
8. Greed - Give Me
"See 2...house was BIGGGG!!!"
9. S.o.S. - Crank This Mutha
"One of several takes on a DJ Food track."
10. Hoovers & Spraycans - Hoovers & Spraycans
"First ravey jawn for the Baltimore crowd."
11. Stereo MCs - On 33 (45 King Dub)
"One of the linchpins."
12. ? - Let The Pros Go
"UK hip house rules Bmore!!"
13. Barbara Tucker - I Get Lifted The Beat
"See 2 again."
14. KW Griff - Odells Beat
"Modern example of the old school sound."
15. II Da Life - Go
"One of the first Bmores nobody ever mentions."
16. Ultraworld - Life After Death
"See 2 again and again!"
17. The Blunted Dummies - House For All (S-Man's Deep In The Vibe Edit)
"Best selling Unruly jawn ever."

Next our good homie Emynd makes his Unruly debut with a digital only release including this track for free
emynd - to all my haters
Plus he is about to drop a bass mix with 4 Am Jess to promote his apperance at Serg from Beer and Rap's Monthly SF throwdown entitled Face Up Ass Down. Serg is our dude and his wife is the lovely dj Stef and if you live around SF and don't hip this party you'se an idiot.

RIP K-SWIFT

2008-07-22T10:46:00.000-07:00

I feel blessed to have been able to take a 9 hour bus ride out to b-more this weekend to have seen her spin. She was so good. Sincerest respect and love to all her friends, family, and fans of her. She will be missed.

this is taking from the maddecent blog
from Dirty South Joe:

It’s with the deepest regret, the heaviest heart, and in a state of an almost paralyzing shock that we’re to report that the Queen of Baltimore Club Music died last night due to a drowning accident in the swimming pool at her home. This information is coming directly from our family at Unruly, and as soon as a more detailed explanation is available, we’ll be sure to pass that info along.

Quote:
Will, heart and faith, are all of the traits that this female, Baltimore native, ascertained, in order to excel in a male dominated, hustle-minded, fast paced industry. Khia Edgerton a.k.a the “Club Queen K-Swift” was born and raised in Baltimore, Maryland on October 19,1980. Growing up, she had many influences to help drive her into what some might say is a successful music career and others her destiny. Her influences were Cocoa Channel and Jazzy Joyce along with her father who had an immense passion for music. K-Swift began DJing at the age of 11; now 14 years later, she’s not only Baltimore’s only female DJ, but she’s also the only female Mix Show Coordinator in the country! Her desires to become a professional, well-known DJ were met with numerous obstacles. She received a lot of skepticism from males however; she never let that phase her. Her formula for brushing off all the haters was to just do her own thing and stay focused. Long hours spent working to enhance her DJ skills paid off.

At the age of 18, she was offered an internship at Radio One of Baltimore; 92Q Jams. From this point on, her will, faith, and formula quickly began to turn her yesterday’s dream into a reality. That same year she began producing shows for the station, the first being the Mark Young Show, followed by the Neke @ Night Show. Two years later, her impressive and consistent performance as an intern landed her a job with 92Q, where she officially became the first female DJ on the “Q”. She began DJing for a show that she and an on-air personality, Neke produced, which was called Ladies Night. That show was a big hit, therefore her new offer to be an on air personality was inevitable. After becoming an on-air personality, she then was presented with an opportunity to mix for the “Big Phat Morning Show”. Benefiting from that opportunity and growing as a DJ, she held this position for two years. She then decided to continue to expand her horizons, as she switched from part time to full time. Once she became a full time DJ she began taking over the night show from 6-10 on the Q with her co-host Reggie Reg. Not a surprise that this show became the number one night show in Baltimore. Oh, and it doesn’t stop there, she just doesn’t stop. As changes were being made at the station she remained as the late night DJ, now with co-host Squirrel Wyde, which is currently the number one night show in Baltimore.

K-Swift plays at all the hottest clubs & parties in Baltimore; her fan base is beyond celebrity status. She mixes for all the high school parties as well as in the mall for Downtown Locker Room a popular urban retailer of footwear, apparel, and music. Working at the Q opened numerous doors for K-Swift; she’s done big shows with HOT artist like Paula Campbell and Lil Mo. She‘s a member of the hottest DJ’s in the country known as the Violator All Star DJ’s, as well as the all female squad MURDA MAMIS. Her expertise as a DJ, and her career as an on air personality aren’t the limits of her capabilities. She is also the proud owner of her own Graphics Company, and Production and Management Company (Club Queen Entertainment), while simultaneously selling her own mix Cd’s on her website and in stores across the United States. In addition to all those hats that she wears, she’s also the ONLY female Record Pool Director in Baltimore for Direct Drive Record Pool. K-Swift is just unstoppable. She’s unique and unpredictable. She always bringing the hottest and latest music, not only does she bring hype to the party through her mixing skills, but her aggressive voice on the mike boosts the entire experience. Her love for what she does along with her caring and outgoing personality has taken her to the top, but she’s never going to settle. There’s so much more out there that she would like to pursue. Her goal right now is to go on tour with a major artist, and excel at being an entrepreneur. K-Swift is definitely a woman that the music industry doesn’t want to sleep on, she conquers any and all obstacles that come her way, and her drive should let you know that she can’t stop, and won’t stop, until she’s done it all.

She carried a mysterious, almost mythic quality about herself and her craft to some of us club music fanatics outside of Baltimore. We’ve always known that she had the ability to make and break artists in her city, and that she held it down on 92Q radio, but until this past weekend, I don’t think we knew the first thing about her. Her Dj sets at the My Crew Be Unruly party at the Paradox, and at the Artscape festival the next day (with DJ Class) were nothing short of incredible. Friday night at the Dox was so devastating in fact, that her jaw dropping set actually had Diplo nervous about following her, and I’ve NEVER heard him admit anything similar of the sort before then. He and I literally talked about her all day yesterday. The conversation was something to the effect of “Isn’t K Swift the most awesome person in the history of awesomeness?!” and then we’d compare notes about how effortlessly cool, and what an immensely talented dj she was. Shawn Caesar says she couldn’t stop talking about how excited she was to have been spinning with Diplo, and how much she was looking forward to working with all of us in the nearest future…WTF? THIS ISN’T FAIR!

Shawn, Scottie and the rest of the Unruly fam, I have no idea what yall are going through…especially Shawn because I know you were as close as family to each other. Your loss is our loss, and what this beautiful and talented woman brought to the table can not ever be replaced. She was a pioneer in her field and she expanded that vista almost every day to include more and more successes. I’m so sorry, Baltimore. We love you!

Rest In Peace K Swift, The Queen Of Baltimore and Club Music worldwide.

Tonight at the scissor test me and evaredy celebrate K-Swift and Baltimore Club music, no cover, 2 dollar pbrs, and it goes down at the Red Door in Portsmouth, NH

B-MORE

2008-07-17T22:19:00.000-07:00

Catch me in b-more at this ridicolous party look at the fucking line up, then I am hanging at whartscape with Human Host

Big post when I get back

cream shampoo...what it do

2008-07-15T15:53:00.000-07:00

can you find a record deal for my brother? No, I can't
kool keith - little girls
cause sometimes you just need to do a kool keith post

Tuesday scissor test with Buzzard

2008-07-10T10:30:00.001-07:00

Tuesday July 15th we got god buzzard playing the scissor test (think a bunch of weirod drone freak out shit, its like suicidal tendencies making out with suicide)no cover, we got them 2 dollar pbrs, and I'll be playing all them records you love with evaredy all night

As always it goes down at the red door

celebrate!!!

2008-07-07T18:37:00.000-07:00

wait a minute A-Rod has been seduced by Madonna and kaballa and goes into a trance anytime a madonna video plays on the tv (well thats what his ex trainer tells anyone with a camera)

Wow, its great to be a red sox fan on this day. And to be honest I have just been looking for an excuse to post this mp3. This is the perfect track for dudes who like to dance with their shirts off. And yes,we all know A Rod so fierce, and definitely a dude who does not wear a shirt while he dances, and we at drunk and focused say god bless his ability to be a total tool, and of course hit home runs when it does not matter. Mickey Mantle would be proud.
stardust/madonna - music sounds better with you (thunderpuss 2000 holiday mix)

gotta have old house music every monday

2008-06-30T18:05:00.001-07:00

marshall jefferson - move ya body house anthem remix
Not much to say about this track other than its the remix of one the most famous house tracks ever. So essential.

Side note I am visiting my girl, she is a tennis pro at some country club for rich folk, and I was searching for a place to buy a coffee and opened a door thinking it was an entrance and it turned out it was the fire alarm door, and a huge siren went off. And their was foreigners being taught some form of dancing in the corner, and all I wanted was a coffee and instead I turned the place into this

I rule

FREAKOUT

2008-06-24T13:46:00.000-07:00

So dude Justin calls me yesterday an hour before he is supposed to play a show with the fucking silver apples to tell me, "Hey dude I forget to tell you I am playing a show with the silver apples tonight." Man what an asshole. He never posts and never tells me when his playing with awesome bands.

But regardless come check out his really awesome band MMOSS tonight at the first of the soon to be monthly freakout parties at scissor test.
bubble puppy - hot smoke and sasafras

ol house monday even though perv don't know jack

2008-06-23T20:17:00.001-07:00

salamandos - jack that dick
I don't really know jack about this song other than I think it was re-released on a 12 inch that came out 2005. Either that was a re-release or these dude was really good at making his shit sound like some old jack shit. Somebody hit me up with some more info on this dude. Also if you never saw this movie, do yourself a favor and watch it. Its really dope.

This is what I am doing sunday morning

2008-06-22T07:36:00.000-07:00

This is probably the greatest dance show ever made. It's from Detroit and called The New Dance show, and its like Dance Party USA, expect it doesn't suck, or have the token really chubby akward white girl, which is always funny, but I don't want to see her freaking to detroit techno, and booty bass shit. Also added awesomeness in the commericials halfway through the clip.

Yo did you know if you had been doing improvements to your house you could have gotting credit, regardless of how bad your previous credit is? The dude just doesn't care and keeps screaming give that man credit. And did every club in detroit used to be some sort of strip club?

Check out the dudes in the blue suit....wow I need to hire these guys just to come dance when I play out
And finally one of the best tag teams ever. They are like the midnight express of dance music, all they need is james. e. cornette with a tennis racket

CELTICS

2008-06-18T10:13:00.000-07:00

sorry Bonner

ol house monday

2008-06-16T21:42:00.000-07:00

night crawlers - push the feeling on

EDDIE!

2008-06-13T10:11:00.000-07:00

I'm not crying
It's just been raining
on my face
And if you think you see some tear tracks down my cheeks
Please. Pleasee, don't tell my mates
I'm not crying
No, I'm not crying
And if I am crying
It's not because of you
It's because I'm thinking about a friend of mine who you don't know who is dying
That's right, dying
These aren't tears of sadness because you're leaving me
I've just been cutting onions
I'm making a lasagna
For one
Oh, I'm not crying
No
There's just a little bit of dust in my eye
That's from the path that you made when you said your goodbye
I'm not weeping because you won't be here to hold my hand
For your information there's an inflammation in my tear gland
I'm not upset because you left me this way
My eyes are just a little sweaty today
They've been looking around
They're like searching for you
They've been looking for you
Even though I told them not to
These aren't tears of sadness
They're tears of joy
I'm just laughing
Ha ha ha-ha ha
I'm sitting at this table called love
Staring down at the irony of life
How come we've reached this fork in the road
And yet it cuts like a knife'
I'm not crying
I'm not crying
I'm not cry-y-y-y-
-y-y-y-y-ing

dude

2008-06-12T11:38:00.000-07:00

what the hell is up with this picture of Dana Carvey? Between the bad hair, and shitty make up he looks a like a wierd lesbian elf. The bastard child of Martin Short and Ellen Degenerous, seriously what the fuck is up garth?

Also new mix coming SOON, in honor of the impending freakout and a sequal to wire influenced mix the king stay the king, word.

tonight at the scissor test

2008-06-10T15:16:00.000-07:00

Eat Cloud will be playing, its the first time he's played back in NH since the Manitoba show, and the first time at scissor test in too long. Scissor Test hearts eat cloud, he really dope. Don't forget Brian Levin and Truman Peyote are playing too! Starts at 9

This remix always sounds ten times better when it is the summer. In the winter I would never drop this, but now its one of those nice early warm up records. You also realize Akon is on it right. Yeah he was in the refugee camp who knew?
fugees - fu-gee-la(refugee camp global mix)

its too hot...ol house monday

2008-06-09T13:58:00.000-07:00

It's too hot in the east right now, no I am not talking to you Jeru, I am talking to the sun. We had a deal and you broke it by burning me. If I get cancer from this we are fistfighting you son of a bitch. Now an acid house remix of New Order, and why cause I am clever and this is the 808 state so hot remix.
new order - blue monday (808 State So hot remix)

Also big shout out to Emynd and Bo Bliz who stopped by NH this friday to kill it at the scissor test party with some dope djing(even if the cover made sure we djed to absolutely nobody whoever goes to scissor test, what can I say my crowd likes cheap beer, booty music and coming to the club only on tuesdays). The 3 Year anniversary month, yeah its a month long celebration now, and yes we like de la soul on their third album, yes ego tripping,continues tomorrow with a huge scissor test show with Eat Cloud, Brian Levin, and boston's Truman Peyote. Its free at the Red Door in Portsmouth, NH 107 State Street and as always no cover, and we got you covered with them 2 dollar pbrs.

TONITE!!! Emynd and Bo Bliz at the 3 year Anniversary of Scissor Test

2008-06-06T13:13:00.000-07:00

8-1 come party tonight at the Red Door. Me and evaredy will be doing a warm up set from 8-10:30 before Emynd and Bo Bliz step up and kill the place. 2 dollar pbr dranks till 10, so come out early and get drunk on cheap beer and stay late and get drunk on fancy drank and the sounds of Emynd and Bo Bliz. Now here are two songs I won't be playing tonight, I got to do one of them proper warm up sets, but come out tuesday and I'll drop them.
megadeath - symphony of destruction

burial - archangle (boy 8 bit remix)

we famous

2008-06-05T08:01:00.000-07:00

Fuck Aresenio Hall, scissor test too famous for him
scissor test

God Bless You Keith Sweat volume 2: fuck a criminal (literally)

2008-06-04T10:04:00.000-07:00

Ahh man imagine if Keith Sweat was a detective, you know fighting crime and shit, and how cool would he be? Really fucking cool. I am talking McNulty times ten, I am talking a handsome version of the short fat guy with a moustache from NYPD Blue, I am talking William Shatner from whatever cop show he was on, TJ Hooker or some shit. I am talking about the best damn detective you ever did see. I am talking Keith Sweat in the Twisted video.

So video starts off at 6 pm at the commissioners’ ball. We see Keith looking dapper in a black and white suit with no tie. He is a rebel, and rebels don't wear any fucking ties. Then we some hot broad flirt with Keith before we cut to a scene were some baldheaded Asian dude is shot and robbed for his chain by some good looking female. The assailant runs by and Keith just looks up cool like it isn’t a thing a masked assailant ran by. This is why Keith is the best nothing fazes him. Turns out the assailant is the same hot broad that was hitting on him from before. Yep small fucking world. Next we go to Keith in a suave all white suite with some backup singers dancing and singing. Then we cut to Keith investigating the bathroom stall where the murder happened, and we realize then Keith is definitely going to solve this case. Then we cut back to more Keith singing and bobbing his head all in white. So awesome, I imagine five girls just got pregnant from watching this scene. Side note how next level are Keith's hand motions? All right here is where it gets awesome cause Keith finds out where the on the run broad lives and comes there, first with pistol in hand, then he realizes girl just wants to bang him as she holds handcuffs out with a come hither I need some Keith Sweat sperm look. This should be a Wikipedia term - need keith sweat sperm an affliction held by most ladies in his presence. We assume they bang and then dramatic cut to the phone- Keith picks up he says, "hello." Then we realize it’s the on the run girl, yes the one he banged, and she is on the fire escape with cops surrounding her, turns out she hung herself. Yes, bitch is dead. Keith looks up with that familiar stare of yeah I banged her, and I solved the case, fuck you david caruso, fuck you.

God Bless you keith sweat, god bless you