Wednesday, October 26, 2005

An Orange Jubilee for breakfast to get me through the day

The grand puba of all MadDog is orange jubilee. This is the wine of choice of derelicts, homeless people, drunks, jailbirds, trainhoppers, and my homie fhrate. This is also the maddog I broke my cherry with. You see fhrate was the dude; he could write like a motherfucker , and I stress write like a motherfucker he is that good (I will post some links to his writing soon), he used to hop trains (honestly how many kids hop trains in 2005? Now its just some fantasy bullshit you read in a kerouac (or whatever) novel thinking wow thats pretty rad about while in reality my man used to do that shit not out of some fantasy shit but mainly cause its one of the few things he truly loved.) Fhrate was also one of the most real and nice dudes you could have met. Fhrate is also the one who got me into a love of maddog for better or worse, and believe me when he drank it was for the worst. Fhrate passed away this summer and I found out a few hours after I had finished this mix (the eerie thing was I had put the finishing touches on this mix by putting Bukowski's spoken word of his poem "The Last Days of the Suicide Kid" at the end as the seeming climax before the final mixdown.) Anyway here's the mix and its all over the place as usual and features some spoken word shit throughout from bukowski, john cage, hunter s. thompson and what not and also a cameo track from that dude Justin who will be posting as soon as he stops living the rock n roll fantasy. I am saying dude thinks he is eddie van halen now that his band is getting large (although I must admit his band is pretty bad ass). Anyway here is the mix

uicide kid

m83 - don't save us from the flames (boom bip remix)
that dude justin - intense herb demo 2
odd nosdam - untitled
diplo- works
pink floyd - several small furry animals groovin
squarepusher - tundra 4 (acid remix)
the bug and daddy freddy - run dem place red (aphex twin remix)
silver apples - program
daedelus - now and then
boom bip - closed shoulder (clouddead remix)
boards of canada - base free
mike jones, paul wall, slim thug - still tippin (diplo remix)
AFX - untitled
dj shadow - midnight in a beautiful world

Monday, October 24, 2005

Mista Don't Play with my goddamn red grape wine

First things first Red grape Wine is the wine choice for belligerence. This is the bottle of maddog you start off the night with so you can be told the story of all the gully things you did the night before. These gully things may include getting thrown down a flight of stairs, thrown through a wall, and thrown through a door into a hallway and landing on some broad sitting down in the hallway to who you appologize to only to have your roommate (who is jewish yet dressed like santa clause and covered in blood) say's it doesn't matter she's just a little poon. This is also the wine that will make you wake up to a bed full of puke (just saying there is nothing worse than this and at the times like this I wish I had just pissed my pants instead, things to know I am a drunk puker not pisser, there is no r kelly in my bloodstream) and or have to clean the bathroom up for your roommates because you can't find the toilet bowl in your drunken state (I am just saying what could happen). Also your more likely to fight a frat kid and or get kicked out of a frat you crashed blacked out by a group of dudes in matching abercrombie clothes. (Hey the kids need to be warned of what happens on md night of red grape wine in a college town, I am saying I am a PSA for responsible drinking)

Now onto the music and the soundtrack for Red Grape Wine is Project Pat's albulm Mista Don't Play. This is the Project Pat albulm that has a soft spot in my heart and the albulm you will most likely hear me bumping in my car. Side note I was going to a dj gig one night blasting some Project Pat when a group of white teenagers of the pasty goth kid sect heard my bass music. Since they were white, lame, and never getting laid by a hot girl, they proceeded to attempt to diss me by throwing their hands up and down like they were in black face imitating their favorite rappers. Problems with this is first of all I hate most white people, especially the pasty I wear black to be different yet the same as all the other sallies who wear black kids. I mean who the hell is still into goth, what are we at a Cure concert? Shit get a new style, you pussies have been moping about the same shit and crying for years now. Next nobody, and I mean nobody, disses project pat or bass music in general. Fuck you and your emo rock that shit is for bitches pure and simple. I mean fuck yeah I blare Project Pat with pride and I don't care if I am pulling a Masta Ace and being born to roll cause honestly you know beat pervert won't play no elvis in my ride. Anyway I flipped them off and smiled and turned up Project Pat because you know I was born to roll with these tracks.

break da law 2001

So High


Fuckin With the Best

Cheese and Dope

Now onto the ratings scale for this albulm. Mista don't Play recieves a definite blumpkin, and I mean I honestly think this is the best record in the world to listen to while recieving one. A blumpkin for those who don't know is when you recieve a blow job from a female (or dude if your into that, we at Drunk and Focused don' give a fuck about one's sexuality we love you all, well except goth kids you fucking sallies and yeah nice black eye makeup what did your sister put that on for you). But yeah next time you need to take a shit you should grab a bottle of mad 2020 red grape wine, your girl and a boommbox bumping Mista don't Play and hell have a good time in the bathroom. I gurantee it will be more rewarding than reading the boston globe. Also my roommate can make blumpkin statues out of clay, if anybody would like to recieve a blumpkin clay statue get at me and we will send you one for a small monetary fee. Hell I would make a special mantle to put this project pat cd and my clay blumpkin on if I was you'se kids.

Its 3 Am put a tape in the deck

There needs to be more music designed for the early hours of the AM from 2-4. We here at drunk and focus recgonize this need and we will provide you some music for your insominiac needs. This isn't gonna be some weak ass theivery corp type downtempo either. First of all fuck theivery corp, and fuck kruder and dorfmeister you fucking simon and garfunkle cover looking like motherfuckers. If I have to hear one more fucking 40 year old yuppie request that shit I am gonna go crazy. In fact the next person who requests the before mentioned while I am djing I will puke on. And I blame all house djs for this shit, motherfuckers are too lazy to dig for some good beats so they just buy mushroom vol 4 on vinyl and play it before they break out some shitty deep house, also fuck you for playing one shitty scion sponsored hip hop track a night to show how hip you are, what is that a J5 record in your bag, seriously shut the fuck up and sit down. Sorry for the rant and now onto the tracks mostly of the rock/robot music persuasion. Here a couple tracks I dig listening to late at night from neutral milk hotel, out hud, Neotropic, and some classic live rock shit from Traffic

Neutral Milk Hotel - Heroin Bag

Out Hud _ its for you

Neotropic - Inch Inch

Traffic - Empty Pages Live

Friday, October 21, 2005

Are You there God its me boards of canada

I bet alot of you out there is wondering what an interview between cult writer Judy Blume, you know the dumb tile who wrote "Maybe Again I won't" to introduce 13 year old boys the joy that is voyeurism (for real dude used to use binoculars to spy on some teenager with some big ol titties, I don't make this shit up) and books about periods. Fuck I read that book as a kid and had no idea it was all a metaphor for bleeding out the vag, I thought it was some I love jesus shit. But anyway this is what an interview with them two would sound like.
Who'd thought god was a judy blume fan

Now onto the questions I would have asked gawd. First did Nas Knock out Jesus when he snuffed him at the age of 12, word in the bible district is that jesus has a suspect jaw, think don flamingo of Mike tyson's punchout fame. Next Is their a freindly rivalry between big L (the devils' son) and jesus in heaven? And if so has Big L dropped a punchline about JC's girl being a whore yet? And lastly who killed tommy's boy?

Now you might be wondering what the hell does this have to do with Boards of Canada and it all ties into the beauty that is an Eskimo Bloodhound. You see at drunk and focused we don't review albulms in the typical fashion we instead give them a rating of the most extreme sexual thing you would do to listen to said record. For example an albulm such as Wu Tang's 36 chambers would be the equivilant of letting a girl shit on your chest. That means that albulm is that fucking good that you would let a girl shit on your chest just for listening to it, its like the 5 mic system of the source if those ratings actually meant something. And lets be honest whats better praise 5 mics or letting a girl shit on your chest. Now onto the new boards albulm which is dope enough that I would give my girl a an eskimo bloodhound with a rudolph finish to listen to the new Campfire Headphase. For those who don't know an eskimo bloodhound is when you go down on a girl her during her "are you there god its me margaret" phase of the month, and proceed to stick your nose into her vagina and wiggle it around like you were giving her an eskimo kiss. From there you can turn it into rudolph the red nosed reindeer (chirstmas is just around the corner kids) by then proceding to go from the eskimo kiss to her box to her nose there by making her look like rudolph the red nosed reindeer. Now with that out of the way he's the free stuff.

chromakay dreamcoat

84 Pontiac dream

Constants are changing

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Maddog 20/20 Challenge

We here at Drunk and focused are about two things living by the g code that is what would too short do and sippin on drinks. To kick off this shit beat pervert will be doing the maddog 20/20 challenge which is drinking all the different flavors of maddog and then posting music that corresponds with the flavor, thats right we are providing a soundtrack to belligerence. We are gonna kick this off with Kiwi-Lemon the most soft hands batch of maddog there is (this what serg of would drink if he wasn't such a pussy and only drank beer and the occasional cutty cutty bang bang). This is the bottle you would also use seduce your hobo trainhopping girlfriend with, yes its that classy. First we gonna start out with b-more club because other than good club drugs kiwi lemon maddog is the best thing to get your dance on to classy lyrics such as "there some whores in the house" or "dick like a new jack". This mix is b-more mix from cex (and thankfully he doesn't rap on it) recorded live in April of 2004 off the So Know You Fuckers Wanna dance shit with kid 606 and also for the house heads towards the end of the mix some french house gets thrown in with stardust's music sounds better with you( its like 98 for y'all over again and you can pretend you are watching mtv's amp and dancing with glow sticks with 17 year old girls on E and vicks vapor rub (side note to a side note nothing is more funny than watching a dude on no drugs think he is getting really high off the the vape(thats my nickname for vicks vapor rub y'all can use it I ain't trademarking that shit, I saw this happen when I was in high school and it was great entertainement, I am also trying to break the record for most comments inside these things ->), and believe me nothing says kiwi-lemon like french house.

Cex's Dj No evil baltimix 6000 can be snatched up here

Next we have a track from Stark Reality off their Now anthology off of Stones Throw Records. Stark Reality is one of those record diggers wet dreams sampled by the likes of Large Professor, j-Live, Madlib, and even those dames that are too soft to even fuck with kiwi lemon the black eyed peas. ( You might be wondering why stark realty fits in with kiwi lemon and here's why this shit was used for the kids,(one of the dudes from stark reality licensed the tracks for some children's programming) and like trick daddy and us dudes at drunk and focused, stark reality luh da kids. Since I am all for the kids I think they should all start their first drinking experience with a bottle of maddog 20/20 kiwi-lemon, because first mikes hard lemonade and the like is for pussies and high school girls, and maddog shows who has the potential to be a true sipper. Second I want to weed out the true sippers at an earlyy age and if you handle the maddog you can roll with my posse. Also I am taking applications for weed carriers, responsibilties include holding my weed, carrying my records into clubs, and taking a slap from the occasional girl while I am blacked out due to too much orange jubilee and or jack and cokes.

Stark Reality - Too much tenderness

Lastly we have some Boards of Canada because their new albulm dropped yesterday and we here at drunk and focused think big tings out of them boards of canada. We have nothing new off their latest albulm yet (check back in the coming week for that) but we will leave you with some remixes and other gems. First we have the boards of canada remixed by stereolab ( you can impress your indy rock gf for weeks with this track, and or the french jawn you always had your sites on.)

Boards of Canada - Kid For Today (stereolab remix)

Next we have the boards of canada stepping up to to do a rare remix (these dudes live in caves and come out once a month to say either hi, we have a new remix, or a new albulm, or just to say get the fuck off my property you damn hippies: little known fact boards of canada hates hippies. We at drunk and focused also hate hippies and when your around this much hippies in NH (thats new hampshire not no homo you sally) you would understand why hating hippies is a must. This is a remix of Clouddead's Dead Dogs two which is about roadkill and the like. Dogs die and shit happens, good tune though.

Clouddead -Dead Dogs two (boards of canada remix)

Lastly we have some more boards of canada in a mix I did with that dude justin a little while back I think around spring or winter 2004. Dude Justin is an enigma. He loves pyche and kraut rock and plays in seventy two bands at last count and will be blessing you idiots out in cyber space with some wierd but great rock music. He's about two things in life: rock n roll and boobs. To top that he is big supporter of Miller High Life because he is classy and where's a tie to get drunk. This mix was done under the influence of miller high life which is the beer equivilant of kiwi lemon mad dog.
Here's the playlist

boards of canada - roygbiv
boom bip - closed shoulder (clouddead remix)
Faust - Picnic on a Frozen River
sole - selling live water (nosdam remix)
Neu! - Negativeland
madvillian - America's most blunted
beatles - tommorow never knows
sixtoo w/Damo Suzuki - Storm clouds & silver linings
can - I'm so green
Das Radio mix

Next up orange jubilee and red grape wine.