Monday, April 10, 2006

judy blume cries less that white dudes these days

The show opens up with Rusty (the dude who tried to back little carmine last year during the power struggle after Carmine died) opening an invitation for Jon's daughter Allegra, yes like the allergy medicine, wedding reception. The court grants that Johnny sack can get 6 hours released from prison to attend the services, but he would have to pay for the extra security costs such as metal detectors and what not. Tony is finally going back to work and has a new driver and bodyguard that looks like vin diesel named Perry Annunziata. Tony seems a little intimidated by how ripped dude was and is insecure that everyone is now in better shape than him, even remarking to Perry that he used to be able to bench over three hundred pounds.

Tony is then back in dr. melfi's office asking if he can get a mercy fuck for everything he has been through. Melfi tries to press him on Junior, but he wants to instead focus on AJ. After this tony heads to the pork store to meet with the crew. When he gets there he compares his scar with Chris' scars from being shot. Before tony leaves the store, Phil stops by with a request from Phil to have Tony do a favor for him and take out rusty. Tony has to say no that he has done enough of his dirty work and it's time to set some limits.

Now they show some titties and ass. Or ass and titties as Chris and a couple cronies are getting after hour lap dances from some nice girls trying to work their way through college. Muhammed and Ahmed (and no not the rap duo of the dude from real world san Francisco and the dude that rapped that back in the day song) come by to drop off some money for 120 credit card numbers and security codes. They also ask chris if he could get them some automatic tech nines to handle some family bidness. We then go to a scene of mister magoo, Junior, as he is put in a pysche ward facility. In the facility junior claims his innocence in shooting tony, saying if anything happened it was a gun malfunction and begs to be let go back home. The next day Carmela intercepts a paper before Tony could get it that showed a picture of Junior with a headline that reads "cushy pysche lock-up."

The wedding day comes and allegra squeezes all that junk, and I mean all that junk into a wedding dress. The metal detector goes off as Tony enters the wedding and they ask him to take off his shoes. As he goes to do this he falls down, and is embarrassed that people will view him as weak. The reception is on and broke back vito pulls Tony to the side and gives him his hefty taste of the strip mall and to give him the info that the dude with the municipal swimming pool bids is willing to play ball. Tony then meets with johnny and fakes talking at the old folks table so US marshalls wouldn't bee to suspicious of their convo. Johnny begs tony to take care of the rusty issue and tony finally relents and tells him he will. Chris then tells Tony he thinks this was the wrong move and will turn out bad.

The wedding is ending and as Allegra, who surprisingly has terrible allergies, is driving off with her husband the US marshalls drive up and block the exit out, and take Jon away. Jon Pleads for them to let his daughter leave but they refuse and jon breaks down and bawls, pulling an adam morrison and losing the respect of Phil and his fellow wise guys. Tony actually sticks up for phil after the incident claiming, "He has seen tougher guys cry at weddings...and when it involves a daughter all bets are off."

Brokeback vito leaves the wedding early and tells his wife he needs to go make some collections that night. His collections were getting dressed in leather and going to a gay bar to pick up some dudes. As Vito is loving life and dancing the night away with his fellow of choice, a couple wise guys their to pick up money from the bartender see him their and call him out for being gay. Vito attempts to tell them this was a big joke, but they don't believe it and tell him to say hi to his wife for them. After this vito goes back home and grabs a gun and checks into a motel. He calls up silv at 3 am to tell him if he needs anything he is there for him. All Silvio wants him to do is hang up so he can go back to sleep. I am saying foreshadow to the second episdoe where Vito tells Janice maybe Gene killed himself cause he was a closet homo and didn't think he could talk to anyone about it.

Tony is back at Melfi's complaining that since he has left the hospital he has noticed people questioning his judgment when before they never would have. Melfi tells him people now sense he is weak and if he wants to overcome this he must reassert his authority. To do this Tony goes back to the pork store and sizes up everyone there. He decides that the Vin Diesel look a like is the most physically impressive and thus his prime target. Tony then picks a fight with him and proceeds to beat the shit out of him to reassert he is in fact the alpha male and can still fuck you up when needed. After the beatdown he heads to the bathroom to puke out blood from all the exertion as the episode ends.

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