Monday, May 15, 2006
Crybabies and Johnny Cakes its like a b-movie film
Jonny "crybaby" sacks is approaching trial and the feds have calculated his net worth and are getting to take all his assets to increase the pressure on the crybaby and hope he makes a deal. Jonny tells his lawyer no way he will snitch. Apparently he is a big fan of the t-shirt, "Stop Snitching."
Elsewhere Janice goes to visit tony and complains that he always makes fun of bobby for being fat and having a model train collection hobby, and that he works his ass off and should be a captain. She thinks he punishes him to get back at her. Tony denies this but later tells Melfi that its true. And that Janice back in the day used to be hot and had dudes all over and was the one person who would stand up to his mother. But also that she fled NJ as soon as she could and left him to deal with all the bullshit. And when they were kids she recorded a fight tony had with barbara when she was babysitting him and used it to "extort" tony into doing her chores for a month. This was a big issue causing taping someone in the soprano family is one of the biggest taboos one can do.
Elsewhere vito is in the library drinking vodka and pretending to write when his bf johnny cakes comes to confront him and calls him out on not being a sports writer after he dug through the trash or something crazy gf like to find out. Vito confesses that its true he is not a writer, but rather a contractor from Jersey and he had to leave his wife and kids. Johnny cakes then uses this to maneuver them to take their relationship to the next level and has vito move in with him and gets him a job as a handyman.
Next the Mafia housewives invade(yes and this will soon be a reality show on Bravo or some cable channel) Ginny sacks place for her birthday. A hugely distraught Ginny is complaining about life while Janice can't get over how nice her house is. Later on Carmela gets all women like and bitchy because tony hasn't taken care of the building inspector. I am saying carmela needs to shut the fuck up. Just because her dumb ass can't figure out what wood to use and fucked up her project she expects Tony to come to the rescue. I am saying that broad needs to get back to basics and focus on her real duties of cooking. cleaning and satisftying tony in the bedroom. I am saying she is a housewife that's her job.
Elsewhere jonny sacks brother pays tony a visit about trying to work out a deal about potential business ventures in heavy equipment leasing in rebuilding New Orleans. Tony says he will try to work out a deal but it will have to be on his terms. Crybaby agrees because he has no real options. At the meeting the dudes from town of Bounce music are divided. One dude is all for selling while the dad from "Boy Meet's World" is not for it, wondering why would he sell now with so much potential money to be made. I mean he has to think of ben savage's future doesn't he?
Back in New Hampshire Vito tags along with his bf to a fire and ends up saving the day when he climbs a ladder to cut a couple of power lines into the church to ensure the priest doesn't get electrocuted. Johnny cakes is upset and pushes vito while yelling at him , "trying to be a big man huh." The next night or so Vito makes a big italian feast and johnny cakes apologizes and says he was only mad cause vito could have get hurt, proving once and for all who wears the pants in this hurr relationship. The next morning before johnny cakes wakes up vito jets off back to jersey. Back in jersey Vito drinking vodka again crashes into the back of some jeep. The dude wants to call the cops but Vito decides to shoot him in the head instead.
Tony then works out another deal for the new Orleans shit saying if crybaby agrees to sell house for half its worth he will ensure the new Orleans deals happens. Crybaby agrees and tony tells janice that her new house will be that, which she weeps uncontrollably too in thanks. The show ends with Crybaby pleading guilty and getting 15 years and snitching in some way by admitting that he was a member of the mafia, which apparently changes everything. He is now the Mase of the mafia world, ie not a good thang.